Toerag's Irish Toast....re-toasted for St. Paddy

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Balladeer

Administrator

Member Empyrean

since 1999-06-05

Posts 25505
Ft. Lauderdale, Fl USA

0 posted 2010-03-16 10:30 PM

Toerag was drinking at the pub - the thing that he loved most.
That night they gave a trophy to who gave the greatest toast.
Toe raised his frosty mug of beer up high above his head
Then winked to all his barroom pals and this is what he said:

Here's to spending the rest of me life
between the legs of me beautiful wife!

All there agreed it was, by far, the best toast of the night
And Toerag took the trophy home, face beaming with delight.
His wife was waiting up for him. armed with her baseball bat,
Then saw the trophy in his hand and said, "So what is that??"

"They had a contest at the pub. We had a lot of fun...
A trophy for the greatest toast and your sweet hubby won!"
She knew from many years with him the old boy loved to brag
And said, "What was this winning toast that won the cup, Toerag??"

Here's to spending the rest of me life
sitting in church with me beautiful wife!"

Next morning Mrs. Toe was walking to the grocery store
And met LongJohn, who had been at the pub the night before.
"Hey, Mary! Did Toe tell you of the cup he chanced to win
And that it was about YOU?", he smiled, with an evil grin.

"He told me", Mrs. Toe replied. "The toast was very nice
But I don't understand - I mean, he's only been there twice.
First time he fell asleep right in the middle - lazy bum!
The second time I had to twist his ears to make him come!!!"

gilead
Senior Member

since 2008-03-10

Posts 1067
nevada, USA

1 posted 2010-03-16 10:40 PM

Super story poem Balladeer! The twist of double entendre in the last two lines makes it a masterpiece! I'm still laughing!

Art

[This message has been edited by gilead (03-16-2010 11:58 PM).]

Balladeer

Administrator

Member Empyrean

since 1999-06-05

Posts 25505
Ft. Lauderdale, Fl USA

2 posted 2010-03-17 04:57 PM

Thanks, Art...glad you enjoyed!

threadbear
Senior Member

since 2008-07-10

Posts 817
Indy

3 posted 2010-03-19 12:29 PM

Oh poor Toe-Rag.
Not only the victim of double entendre
but the victim of an even worse pun.
Woe is him.
Peace brother,
Jeff

ethome
Member Patricius

since 2000-05-14

Posts 11858
New Brunswick Canada

4 posted 2010-03-19 03:16 AM

HAAAAA! Oh I love it!!

That's gout in the big ol TOE!

Eric

Toerag
Member Ascendant

since 1999-07-29

Posts 5622
Ala bam a

5 posted 2010-03-20 11:07 AM

Yea, Toerag will be back after I finish a few more beers

suthern

Member Seraphic

since 1999-07-29

Posts 20723
Louisiana

6 posted 2010-03-22 05:41 PM

LOL... Keep it up, Bal... maybe you can coax Toe out of hiding for more than a few minutes at a time!!! LOL I can hope!!!! *S*

LindsayP
Member Elite

since 2007-07-28

Posts 3410
Australia, Victoria

7 posted 2010-03-23 12:33 PM

Great post Mike with a broad touch of humor.

enjoyed. Take care.

Lindsay

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