Open Poetry #46 |
First Impression? |
SlowlyFallAway Member
since 2008-08-29
Posts 279North Carolina |
The taste of agony, a hint of passion You possess a brutal influence I thought nothing of Until the day you let me burn Inside the kiln we used to glaze our dreams A bad memory Or maybe just the awareness Of a life you left behind In hopes to turn from a former love You devoted your whole world to one night Still getting nothing more Than a lifetime of regret And an existence bound to burden I waited Through anxious conversations And nights I feared would never end Because you spoke grim words of hesitation With a tone of indecision That forced me not to feel And left me floating carelessly Through a town much more deserted Than my very first impressions Emily Shives December 30th 2010 |
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JerryPat Senior Member
since 2010-10-30
Posts 1991Louisiana/America |
The yin and yang of loves community, or town as you penned it, is fraught with magic and despair, both causes more emotional waste than we really need. This poem meant, to me, that someone was having a mighty struggle and was undecided as to what he really wanted from this love affair, or even it was a love affair, or merely the getting to that point. You stretched out the indecision perfectly and I loved this poem. |
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ethome Member Patricius
since 2000-05-14
Posts 11858New Brunswick Canada |
Nicely done Emily First impression......... That's verisimilitude of the gamble and we all play our hands at the same table. AND, just sometimes, yes sometimes we even win! Trauma comes in many forms doesn't it? Loved this! Eric ain't doin nothin at all just answerin the call |
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Lori Grosser Rhoden Member Patricius
since 2009-10-10
Posts 10202Fair to middlin' of nowhere |
Loved this too! You paint your picture so well, I recognize people and places. Lori |
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Rex Allen McCoy Member Elite
since 2000-01-30
Posts 2863Sippin a Timmy's in London |
how many chances do we give or get, to make first impression ... nice writing |
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XGarapanX Senior Member
since 2008-06-19
Posts 1435Antarctica |
You possess a brutal influence I thought nothing of Until the day you let me burn... Raw and well conveyed ·´~`·»Garapan«·´~`· |
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