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Open Poetry #46
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ethome
Member Patricius
since 2000-05-14
Posts 11858
New Brunswick Canada

0 posted 2010-10-29 12:27 PM



if it seems like she's actin the part remember
she lost her heart on a treadmill of waste
oh she's always known she could do better
but it's the same old action emptiness takes.

oh she'd be afraid if she didn't remember
when she wasn't sure surfin night waves
but now she's spreading the songs of a summoner
spilling sweet notes over hearts she can sway.

in a lounge for the lonely she's the queen of escape
blowin blue ribbon anthems refrained
she calls out souls from graveyards of fate
sending them back through wind reeds of pain

she wears high leather boots with barnacled buckles
her flashin green emeralds over denim and pearls
with long golden hair tossed and ruffled
under the beacons of a midnight world.

out comes the shotglass let the courage sink in
sippin an smokin to the Lord's missin wrath
but when the show opens the scuttlebutt friends
drown in the river of blues she can pass.  

the crowd comes seasoned with da capo survival
downing their liquor in candlelight smiles
she gives them a chaser with a perfect revival
of some kinda blue from the musical bible.

she smiles at the invites late night repasts  
with the guests all braying their nightcap requests
but she'll turn them off like a bad broadcast
cause their tunes are the ones she's tryin to forget

in a lounge for the lonely she the queen of escape
blowin blue ribbon anthems refrained
she calls lost souls from graveyards of fate
then sends them back through wind reeds of pain

[This message has been edited by ethome (10-30-2010 12:05 PM).]

© Copyright 2010 Eric Lewis True - All Rights Reserved
Amaryllis
Senior Member
since 2010-05-20
Posts 1306
Mi now
1 posted 2010-10-29 12:44 PM


Ohh so lovely... felt this, heard this.. superbly written! The voice is perfectly meshed with subject.  So many favorite parts it`s difficult to pinpoint just one... wonderful  
Best~
Amaryllis

Cpat Hair
Deputy Moderator 1 Tour
Member Patricius
since 2001-06-05
Posts 11793

2 posted 2010-10-29 12:50 PM


got to love a good sax and the notes she sings not only to the ears, but to the soul...


enjoyed sir... great stuff here!

Eusta B. Mae
Senior Member
since 2010-05-03
Posts 903

3 posted 2010-10-29 12:53 PM


That was something else! Loved it! ebm
Paula Finn
Member Ascendant
since 2000-06-17
Posts 5546
missouri
4 posted 2010-10-29 01:41 PM


You always know how to play...sweet poet man
Prasad Nataraj
Senior Member
since 2008-05-29
Posts 1149
Bangalore,India
5 posted 2010-10-30 03:12 AM


fine writing.

"Hardwork pays in the long run"

ethome
Member Patricius
since 2000-05-14
Posts 11858
New Brunswick Canada
6 posted 2010-10-30 12:29 PM


Thank you Amaryllis those are kind words I appreciate the time you took to read and comment.

Eric

Cpat
Yep the ol sax can be the bluesy catalyst between heart and mind. Many thanks for the positive comments and the visit.

Eric

ethome
Member Patricius
since 2000-05-14
Posts 11858
New Brunswick Canada
7 posted 2010-10-30 12:31 PM


Thanks EBM
Glad you enjoyed and stopped in to say so.

Eric

Paula

Longtime no contact. Great to see your name here again. Thanks for the lovely comment.

Still got the big lizard??
Take care

Eric

ethome
Member Patricius
since 2000-05-14
Posts 11858
New Brunswick Canada
8 posted 2010-10-30 12:32 PM


Prasad

Thanks so much my friend!

Eric

Misty Lilacs
Senior Member
since 2005-11-15
Posts 1060
White Birch Forest
9 posted 2010-10-30 02:16 PM


WOW! I really liked this a lot!

ooxx  Marti

ethome
Member Patricius
since 2000-05-14
Posts 11858
New Brunswick Canada
10 posted 2010-10-30 04:24 PM


Misty

Thanks for the "WOW!" I surely appreciate that very much.


Eric

JerryPat
Senior Member
since 2010-10-30
Posts 1991
Louisiana/America
11 posted 2010-10-30 04:45 PM


I like this and the gutsy way it is presented. The poem reminds me of a "she" within my realm of life. You captured the futility completely within the lines of this poem of struggle and retreat. Very nicely done.


ethome
Member Patricius
since 2000-05-14
Posts 11858
New Brunswick Canada
12 posted 2010-10-31 04:12 AM


Thank Jerry

That's what I was trying to do. Even though one has great talent that doesn't separate them from the heartaches we all experience.

Many thanks

Eric

BluesSerenade
Member Patricius
since 2001-10-23
Posts 10549
By the Seaside
13 posted 2010-10-31 11:28 PM


she wears high leather boots with barnacled buckles
her flashin green emeralds over denim and pearls
with long golden hair tossed and ruffled
under the beacons of a midnight world.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

What a magnificent scene you've painted with your words.
The pain is so vivid and yet the smoke and mirrors gave it a certain ambiance.

Made me squint a wee bit.  

Fabulous poem, good poet sir~

ethome
Member Patricius
since 2000-05-14
Posts 11858
New Brunswick Canada
14 posted 2010-11-01 03:06 AM


Thank you Blues

I always appreciate your visits and comments.

Eric

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