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threadbear
Senior Member

since 2008-07-10

Posts 817
Indy

0 posted 2010-06-01 07:35 AM

Someday, An Enemy

He sought into the well by dipping his hands
His face was sun tarnished; the neck swarthy and sticky
A shining diamond aspect winked at him
from deep inside the well
as he dined from bucket
with great vigor.

Dogs carelessly talked to him
and a sudden move dislodged their courage.
He edged past me, hat tilted foward
the sorrowful metal slapping his thighs as he walked.
He turned, briefly, looking at what would be an enemy
if it weren't for the years of my youth
or the skin I was born with.
As his Union jacket laid across his steed,
he tore lose an eagle-faced button
flipping it towards my ebony fingers
like a whistling plugged nickel.

Peculiar are paths of escape
into jaws of adversity
or away from conflict.
He was the first of many of Sherman's men
to desire drink from that Savannah well
in 1864

and I let them.

Margherita
Member Seraphic

since 2003-02-08

Posts 22236
Eternity

1 posted 2010-06-01 08:24 AM

quote:
Peculiar are paths of escape
into jaws of adversity
or away from conflict.

Impressive work, dear Jeff.

Love,
Margherita

Amaryllis
Senior Member

since 2010-05-20

Posts 1306
Mi now

2 posted 2010-06-01 10:03 AM

Masterful writing.. sharp imagery and the tone was spot-on.. the reader is right there, experiencing the moment in all of your lovely detail. Great capture of the human condition- well done

2islander2
Member Ascendant

since 2008-03-12

Posts 6825
by the sea

3 posted 2010-06-01 01:51 PM

very vivid and well expressed, thanks for the enjoyable read.

regards

yann

Earl Brinkman
Senior Member

since 2010-03-03

Posts 1183
Osaka, Japan

4 posted 2010-06-01 07:58 PM

You speak with a luxurious understanding of the period and the imagery you evoke is vivid and real.

whisperingwalt
Member

since 2010-04-29

Posts 240
Coquitlam, BC, Canada

5 posted 2010-06-01 11:08 PM

very well written...you definately convey what you want with a very creative flair...ww

threadbear
Senior Member

since 2008-07-10

Posts 817
Indy

6 posted 2010-06-02 12:36 PM

Thank you all so much for your time and faithful indulgence. I realize there's nothing flowery about the Civil War, but it had it's moments of humanity.
This started out as an exercize in describing a Civil war period-piece. Hope it had some authenticity to it.
Jeff

Marchmadness
Member Rara Avis

since 2007-09-16

Posts 9271
So. El Monte, California

7 posted 2010-06-07 12:04 PM

Haunting, Threadbear.
Ida

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