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Open Poetry #46
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An Eye on Toerag
| Open Poetry #46 |
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An Eye on Toerag |
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Balladeer
Administrator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-06-05
Posts 25505Ft. Lauderdale, Fl USA 
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Toerag sat in the restaurant, with his crackers and Cheeze Wizz, Staring at the tall blonde at the table next to his. She didn't notice that dumb stranger acting like a fool Or see his shirt was covered by a waterfall of drool. She had a face that angels envy, skin as smooth as silk. Far too sophisticated for a man of Toerag's ilk But Toerag simply sat and stared and dreamed of what could be If he were not as homely as an Aboriginie. He heard the sneeze and saw the eyeball flying at his face. He snagged it with a Willie Mays (without old Willie's grace). The gorgeous beauty he admired now only had one eye, Her sneeze had launched the glass one like an arrow in the sky! She thanked Toerag profusely for the saving of her eye And asked our boy to join her. He was such a happy guy! He ate the meal voraciously, a big smile on his face. She asked him if he'd like to have a nightcap at her place. One thing led to another and Toe lay in morning light Reliving every second of a passionate-filled night. Had all this really happened? Was his recollection true? A voice inside his head was saying, "Who would sleep with YOU?" He turned to her and said, "Hey, sweetheart. I don't understand" This whole thing that we shared together really wasn't planned." "Was all this something that you do with every single guy?" "Oh, no", she smiled demurely, "you just happened to catch my eye!"  |
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| © Copyright 2010 Michael Mack - All Rights Reserved | |||
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Oklahoma Rose Senior Member
since 2008-02-28
Posts 1586Oklahoma USA |
LOL! You can sure tell the stories. And I always love to read them. |
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latearrival Member Ascendant
since 2003-03-21
Posts 5499Florida |
Fantastic. One day I will tell you a story about a glass eye and a beautiful girl LOL |
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Brooks M Junior Member
since 2010-05-26
Posts 19California |
LOL... you two really have it in for eachother dont ya.. too funny |
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Toerag Member Ascendant
since 1999-07-29
Posts 5622Ala bam a |
Eye have no idea what this is all about. This is not true. Her name was Eyelean and I could see right thru her..I know what she was after the whole time. [This message has been edited by Toerag (05-28-2010 09:16 AM).] |
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Alison 
since 2008-01-27
Posts 9318Lumpy oatmeal makes me crazy! |
I was reading this out loud - so I am laughing out loud. This is so funny. |
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OldBuddyOldPal Member
since 2008-12-15
Posts 87 |
Your endings are so predictable but not until we get there...... you always keep us guessing!!! |
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Larry C
since 2001-09-10
Posts 10286United States |
An eyecatching tale indeed.  |
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suthern
since 1999-07-29
Posts 20723Louisiana |
I've had my eye on that fine fella for years... didn't know I needed to sneeze an eyeball out... thanks for the tip!!! LOL |
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Mysteria
since 2001-03-07
Posts 18328British Columbia, Canada |
Eye saw that coming! LOL |
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Klassy Lassy Member Elite
since 2005-06-28
Posts 2187Oregon |
Always, the eyes have it!  |
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Andrew Scott Member Elite
since 1999-06-24
Posts 2558Redlands,CA,USA |
Yo Balladeer... They say, "Beauty is in the eye of the beholder." As it relates to Toe, me thinks it sould be... The holder of the eye is in the beauty. "We'll chase them like rats across the tundra." |
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Amaryllis Senior Member
since 2010-05-20
Posts 1306Mi now |
LOL! At Andrew Scott`s comment~! Too rich, love it  I`ve been reading along, laughing away at you two; hesitant to comment `cuz I`m not in `the crowd`, heh! (newbie). But thaaat reply did me in! This whole poem is hilarious, so that was just eye-cing on the cake... =P *groan* (little patience, I`ll get better..) |
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Balladeer
Administrator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-06-05
Posts 25505Ft. Lauderdale, Fl USA |
Thank you all for joining in our little Toefoolery. I like to socket to him...(groan). Amaryllis, you are certainly welcome to join right in...I've read some of your brilliant writing. Toerag told me privately that he doesn't like you at all so you're better off being on MY side. |
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Amaryllis Senior Member
since 2010-05-20
Posts 1306Mi now |
Oh izzat so? lol We`ll have to let him know neither of you seem to be good privates...(re: Toerag in Iraq) or good at being private... heh ~A |
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threadbear Senior Member
since 2008-07-10
Posts 817Indy |
Do you wanna read this again, Threadbear? "Wood Eye? Wood Eye!" harelip harelip (punchline without a joke) |
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Balladeer
Administrator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-06-05
Posts 25505Ft. Lauderdale, Fl USA |
Toerag is actually a very good private! Jeff, one of my Toerad poems in the archives deals with that line! |
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Andrew Scott Member Elite
since 1999-06-24
Posts 2558Redlands,CA,USA |
Amaryllis, be careful of this side pickin'. For pickin' Toe can put you in a jam. And there's none better at pickelin' then our own Balladeer. Whereas, sidin' with the Deer will put crosshairs on you backside... and Toe's a damn good shot. I stepped into this war a long time back. All I can say is bring plenty of ammo of the highest caliber, and be prepared to have at it.  "We'll chase them like rats across the tundra." |
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Amaryllis Senior Member
since 2010-05-20
Posts 1306Mi now |
Eep-! Sorry, Toerag, Balladeer! *puts on Kevlar, ducks for cover |
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Toerag Member Ascendant
since 1999-07-29
Posts 5622Ala bam a |
Dear Amaryllis, I'm so sorry Ball a deer has lied to you about my dislike for you. And, be careful around him, don't trust anyone that always talks about men's "privates".... |
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Dark Stranger Member Patricius
since 2001-03-19
Posts 13631West Coast |
well I suspect she still keeps an eye out for you too? funny stuff you two.. |
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Amaryllis Senior Member
since 2010-05-20
Posts 1306Mi now |
LOL! |
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ken206573 Member
since 2008-10-14
Posts 487 |
ROFLOL I really enjoy the way you two go at each other. The poem is funny witty and a enjoyment to read. I always enjoy your poetic warfare,EYE love it. 
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LngJhnAg Member Elite
since 1999-07-23
Posts 3508Boot+Kitty=Poetry in motion |
Well done, 'Deer. Ol' Toe is speechless almost. Write another poem - that oughta put that scalawag to silence. |
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Prasad Nataraj Senior Member
since 2008-05-29
Posts 1149Bangalore,India |
I heard in cricket that "Catches win matches" however never knew that it would turn out this way. Lol...  "Hardwork pays in the long run" |
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LindsayP Member Elite
since 2007-07-28
Posts 3410Australia, Victoria |
Hi Mike it's just as well that Toerag was on ball, think what an awful night he would have had if he had failed to catch her eye. It doesn't bear thinking about. great poem. Lindsay |
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LindsayP Member Elite
since 2007-07-28
Posts 3410Australia, Victoria |
Hi Mike it's just as well that Toerag was on the ball, think what an awful night he would have had if he had failed to catch her eye. It doesn't bear thinking about. great poem. Lindsay |
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