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Open Poetry #46
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fading of memphis jean
| Open Poetry #46 |
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fading of memphis jean |
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Dark Stranger Member Patricius
since 2001-03-19
Posts 13631West Coast 
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I can still see that dream place in your eyes on those mexican sunday afternoons when you don't know me part of the time and other moments I am still your captain an older leather friend of yours and his your third first mate as you named him and said you didn't want to go to heaven to see some used car salesman god unless there was a warranty of happy ever after so the three of us could go fishing for marlin way on down below rosarito somewhere and drink some local kind of tequila from jars who was I again, you say you think you know me but I look a lot older than the guy you knew and did I ever have a boat down in mexico and smoke smelly hand rolled cigars from cuba and do I know a fisherman named joe from arizona ______________ daark (scribblnote...watching someone drift in and out of mexican drugs..counting the sunday afternoons left on one hand..paying the padre to speak english when he visits her..) |
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Robert E. Jordan Member Rara Avis
since 2008-01-25
Posts 8541Philadelphia, Pennsylvania |
Yo Dark Stranger, The prayers for the sick are rather simple, and beautiful. Check out: http://www.catholic.org/prayers/prayer.php?p=1104 Bobby |
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Dark Stranger Member Patricius
since 2001-03-19
Posts 13631West Coast |
Bobby J...thanks amigo...she just need to understand them..part of trying to keep her mind working as long as possible..in spanish or latin she don't get it at all so she just drifts.. |
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Earl Brinkman Senior Member
since 2010-03-03
Posts 1183Osaka, Japan |
The collocations that you employ are very catchy. ---- The poem as a whole is sad and my sympathies are with your loved one and you at this trying time. |
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Dark Stranger Member Patricius
since 2001-03-19
Posts 13631West Coast |
EB...actually she is a widow of a friend that is being treated (kinda) for terminal cancer in Mexico..she don't even know she is there often..but the non-sad part of this is her world still keeps her with her guy from AZ..thanks for the read.. |
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Eusta B. Mae Senior Member
since 2010-05-03
Posts 903 |
What a touching story you tell as only you can. Very sensitive touch. ebm |
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passing shadows Member Empyrean
since 1999-08-26
Posts 45577displaced |
touching piece here Dark too bad there is never a warranty for happily ever after though |
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Dark Stranger Member Patricius
since 2001-03-19
Posts 13631West Coast |
ms ebm..thanks for the read and comments __________ ms dixie..yep, damn warranty is never what they promise is it..thanks lady friend |
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BluesSerenade Member Patricius
since 2001-10-23
Posts 10549By the Seaside |
Every picture tells a story, just like your poetry. Wonderfully captivating, with just the right touch of dark! *hug* |
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Dark Stranger Member Patricius
since 2001-03-19
Posts 13631West Coast |
thanks babyblue.. |
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Margherita Member Seraphic
since 2003-02-08
Posts 22236Eternity |
You tell this poignant story masterfully, dear D.! Love, Margherita |
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Sunshine
Administrator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-06-25
Posts 63354Listening to every heart |
I know of dream places Sunday afternoons Captains, Heaven, And used car salesmen… I don’t know Tequila But I have smelled cigars…. And I know how to fish. Does this know I might realize A Memphis jean? |
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Bill Charles Member Patricius
since 2000-07-11
Posts 10619highways, & byways, for now |
Dark Stranger - this has got to be the best writing I've ever read of yours. Just something there that talks to one... BC |
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Bastet Member
since 2010-05-07
Posts 246 |
Yes, it is a very evocative poem. You set the scene very well with "those mexican sunday afternoons..." The reference to the used car salesman and the "warrantry of happy ever after" made me smile although the general tone of the poem is dramatic. Just add a chorus and you've got a Mexican Greek tragedy. |
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Dark Stranger Member Patricius
since 2001-03-19
Posts 13631West Coast |
ms mar...thank you lady fried _______________ ms sun, thanks my friend...and only if you promise to remember who I am ___________________ bc, thanks amigo __________ bas..thank you for the review and grin |
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SlowlyFallAway Member
since 2008-08-29
Posts 279North Carolina |
"when you don't know me part of the time and other moments I am still your captain" Everything is a phase. From moments to years. The littlest things have the biggest effects, and the biggest favors often do nothing. I feel like love and trust are here and gone, depending on the moment. |
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Dark Stranger Member Patricius
since 2001-03-19
Posts 13631West Coast |
slowfall..I think when she recognizes me she remembers her love time with the friend of mine that has long since passed on...I doubt she trusts her thoughts too often beyond those moments..thanks for the read |
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threadbear Senior Member
since 2008-07-10
Posts 817Indy |
wonderfully posed to the question of hereafter and the doubts that come into focus as the end of days near Jeff |
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Dark Stranger Member Patricius
since 2001-03-19
Posts 13631West Coast |
thanks Jeff... |
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viking_metal Senior Member
since 2007-02-02
Posts 1337In a Jeep, Minnesota. |
wicked sweet. you weave webs, stranger. Fall in love early, fall in love often. |
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Dark Stranger Member Patricius
since 2001-03-19
Posts 13631West Coast |
thanks amigo.. |
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JamesMichael Member Empyrean
since 1999-11-16
Posts 33336Kapolei, Hawaii, USA |
Interesting...James |
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Dark Stranger Member Patricius
since 2001-03-19
Posts 13631West Coast |
thanks james.. |
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suthern
since 1999-07-29
Posts 20723Louisiana |
I could be applauding your poem... for it's one of your best. But I'd rather be hugging the poet... for reminding her of dreams and happier times during these fading days. A friend indeed... |
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Dark Stranger Member Patricius
since 2001-03-19
Posts 13631West Coast |
ms suthern...it is what friends do....thanks lady friend.. |
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Martie
Moderator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-09-21
Posts 28049California |
DS....your sensitive touches me and always has |
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Dark Stranger Member Patricius
since 2001-03-19
Posts 13631West Coast |
ms martie..thanks lil neighbor |
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