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Open Poetry #46
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Ashes
| Open Poetry #46 |
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Ashes |
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Zeigeist Member
since 2009-12-09
Posts 311Michigan 
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Ashes How the dregs of love gather at the bottom of our soul, a residue from the stench of neglect and the festered scars of abuse. A toxic reminder of loyalties broken, and tender promises torn. They slowly rot in the basement of our lives, then when the flame has finally died, when the warmth is only wispy tendrils of smoke that elude our clutching grasp, they are all that is left. Ashes of dreams, ashes of love, gray, cold, dreadful, ashes. |
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LindsayP Member Elite
since 2007-07-28
Posts 3410Australia, Victoria |
Ziegheist, that is an interesting post my friend, I sense a deep sadness in those words, but one thing I know, the sun will rise and shine again tomorrow and I hope it shines on you. take care. Lindsay |
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Earl Brinkman Senior Member
since 2010-03-03
Posts 1183Osaka, Japan |
What struck me with this poem was your masterful use of collocations. |
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Zeigeist Member
since 2009-12-09
Posts 311Michigan |
Lindsay from the beautiful down under, thank you for your words of sunshine, they do help brighten my day. Zeitgeist |
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Zeigeist Member
since 2009-12-09
Posts 311Michigan |
Thank you much Earl. It's nice to have ones efforts noticed and tagged  Z. |
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BluesSerenade Member Patricius
since 2001-10-23
Posts 10549By the Seaside |
This is a pretty dark spill, written with a keen eye of the despair that is left in love's aftermath. I kind of like the idea of the fire burning itself out. The warmth was wonderful while it lasted, and sure enough there's something to be said for blowing smoke. I felt your poem deep in the heart. It still hurts a little~ Anyway, nice work here, Zeigeist~ |
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Bastet Member
since 2010-05-07
Posts 246 |
A deeply touching poem but so sad. Really great handling of your main metaphor, ashes. |
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