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Open Poetry #47
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martiniat8
Senior Member
since 2003-06-21
Posts 897
Prague, Bohemia, Czech Republic

0 posted 2011-10-20 02:58 PM


"A Question of Youth"


The man sat across from her
Staring, looking longly
into the fading youth of her eyes
the creases of her face, the wrinkles and the lines

They were at an Arabic restaurant
Tea and Hookah room
The scent of apple steam filled the room
photos of common African people looked upon them

He smiled at her, trying to ease her nervousness
They talked of many things,
she tried to sell herself to him
Figuratively

Talking of relationships of older men with younger women,
trying to dissuade him from temptation.
While mentioning and speaking of
her advanced belly dancing abilities


He was dressed nicely as always, jacket, bright red scarf, and Italian shoes
a common problem this proposed
The women in this country often felt insecure
About their level of English, class, and clothes

Before them was a beautiful feast
Humus, babagonoush, salads, pita
and a mixed grill of lamb, chicken and sausage
It was a picture perfect array of colors, aromas and tastes

They shared a tall indigo waterpipe
Puffing perfumed plooms of apple cinnamon steam into the air
She continued to glance at the young couple in the corner
They were holding hands across the table leaning towards each other

She looked down briefly, wanting the same thing
To reawaken the spirit and romance of her youth
She said she was 35, her body said 30 but her eyes and face spoke of 40
Women in this country develop younger but aging faster than the women of his native land

He saw the young couple and remembered
his dinners with his previous girlfriend,
all the moments like that
That they had shared

The woman before him was an older version of her
perplexed, he pondered the question of youth vs. maturity

Similar slim body
Similar hair
His worry was about the chemistry between them
If it was, and will be there

She was everything the younger woman wasn't
Mature, direct, considerate, diverse interests, kind and generous
Her days of playing games, physical relationships, teasing and veiled intentions
Evaporated with the puffs of apple essence

that they exhaled,
in the air...

© Copyright 2011 Kenneth Bradley Smith - All Rights Reserved
Lori Grosser Rhoden
Member Patricius
since 2009-10-10
Posts 10202
Fair to middlin' of nowhere
1 posted 2011-10-20 03:08 PM


I like this...especially your ending.

Lori

JL
Member Ascendant
since 2004-04-01
Posts 6128
Texas, USA
2 posted 2011-10-20 03:12 PM


She was everything the younger woman wasn't
"Mature, direct, considerate, diverse interests, kind and generous
Her days of playing games, physical relationships, teasing and veiled intentions
Evaporated with the puffs of apple essence

that they exhaled,
in the air..."

I guess I agree with Lori.  Very detailed write, a maze of emotion, and the ending was a great conclusion to the story.
Enjoyed.

JL

Love the Lord your God with all your heart, and with all your soul,and with all your mind. Love your neighbor as yourself.
Maranatha!

martiniat8
Senior Member
since 2003-06-21
Posts 897
Prague, Bohemia, Czech Republic
3 posted 2011-10-20 03:21 PM


Thanks! The ending is ok, its pretty and nice, but it is a little more conclusive than I think I want. I want it to be open-ended, that the reader is unsure of their future and the decision to continue the relationship
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