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ice
Member Elite

since 2003-05-17

Posts 3404
Pennsylvania

0 posted 2011-10-02 08:10 AM

"Asters and Goldenrods" painting by Jane Everhart
(http://www.treeline-gallery.com/JaneEverhart.html)

Asters, and goldenrod, soon will be faded;
From a sun lower south, I shade my eyes.
Queen-anns-lace is tattered from freezing,
Repeat in a mirror of a year gone by.
*
From a sun lower south, I shade my eyes
Both saddened, and glad of the changing
Repeat in a mirror of a year gone by;
The heat of our star, now warms the equater.
*
Both saddened, and glad of the changing,
I stand in the realm-of a day, sublime;
The heat of our star now warms the equater,
In the quatrian of seasons ...third line.
*
I stand in the realm-of a day, sublime
Asters and goldenrod, soon will be faded
In the quatrain of seasons...third line,
Queen-anns-lace is tattered from freezing.

Lori Grosser Rhoden
Member Patricius

since 2009-10-10

Posts 10202
Fair to middlin' of nowhere

1 posted 2011-10-02 09:01 AM

Beautiful to both eye and ear.
Sorry I don't know what you call the form
but it was wonderful. Enjoyed this very much!
Lori

Nicole
Senior Member

since 1999-06-23

Posts 1835
Florida

2 posted 2011-10-02 09:05 AM

I'm seeing Fall wherever I go today and I am loving it!

ice
Member Elite

since 2003-05-17

Posts 3404
Pennsylvania

3 posted 2011-10-02 12:11 PM

Lori
The eyes and ears are very alert to sights and sounds in autumn. Thank you.
The form is the "Pantoum" go here if you want to see the form rules. http://www.baymoon.com/~ariadne/form/pantoum.htm

*Nicole...Yup, fall is all around now, though it continues to rain in the north east.
It is in the air between the drops.
Thanks for the reply.

ebonygirl
Member Elite

since 2011-07-14

Posts 2000
California U.S.A

4 posted 2011-10-02 03:16 PM

Fall is my favorite season, enjoyed your poem, Ice,
ms. e

Marchmadness
Member Rara Avis

since 2007-09-16

Posts 9271
So. El Monte, California

5 posted 2011-10-02 03:57 PM

Beautiful picture, Lovely poem, ice.
Ida

BluesSerenade
Member Patricius

since 2001-10-23

Posts 10549
By the Seaside

6 posted 2011-10-02 07:15 PM

Quite a work of art, a glorious presentation all the way around.

Love the splendor you bring to mind!

Margherita
Member Seraphic

since 2003-02-08

Posts 22236
Eternity

7 posted 2011-10-03 11:11 AM

I stand in the realm-of a day, sublime;

You made me stand right beside you, dear Ford, loving the visions and the tunes.

Thank you for the link about Pantoum. Interesting!

Margherita

suthern

Member Seraphic

since 1999-07-29

Posts 20723
Louisiana

8 posted 2011-10-03 03:02 PM

Beautiful presentation of poem and painting! *S*

JL
Member Ascendant

since 2004-04-01

Posts 6128
Texas, USA

9 posted 2011-10-04 07:43 PM

You never cease to amaze.
Wonderful write and graphic.

JL

Love the Lord your God with all your heart, and with all your soul,and with all your mind. Love your neighbor as yourself.
Maranatha!

ice
Member Elite

since 2003-05-17

Posts 3404
Pennsylvania

10 posted 2011-10-06 06:52 AM

OMG, what wonderful replies...:-)

Time restrictions don't allow for individual thank yous at this time, but please don't ake that as meaning that each is not treasured.

Thank you, each and all, for your attention to my scribbles..

Come read to me some poem,
Some simple and heartfelt lay,
That shall soothe this restless feeling
And banish the thoughts of day.
Longfellow

Krawdad
Member Elite

since 2001-01-03

Posts 2597

11 posted 2011-10-06 10:41 AM

Nice work, Ice!
A cool form when done so well.
Good to see one pop up now and then.

OwlSA
Member Rara Avis

since 2005-11-07

Posts 9347
Durban, South Africa

12 posted 2011-10-06 01:30 PM

The pantoum, is a favourite form of mine, when, as Krawdad said, it is done so superbly. Ford, I lost myself in this timeless beauty, and didn't want to come out of it. Going back to read it again. I love the painting too.

Owl

[This message has been edited by OwlSA (10-08-2011 01:01 AM).]

Michael

Moderator

Member Rara Avis

since 1999-08-13

Posts 7666
California

13 posted 2011-10-06 02:18 PM

Beautifully penned, ice. Loved the pic as well. Thank you.

Michael

ice
Member Elite

since 2003-05-17

Posts 3404
Pennsylvania

14 posted 2011-10-07 07:56 AM

Krawdad, Owl, Micheal and all..
Thank you for the replies....:-)
I do like this form, but it is very hard for me to do.
Please note that "Queen AnnsLace" is to be said like that...I don't know any other way to put it on paper, other than adding dashes.

Sunshine

Administrator

Member Empyrean

since 1999-06-25

Posts 63354
Listening to every heart

15 posted 2011-10-07 07:34 PM

tch, tch, and I thought our Prairie Inkwells group had covered Pantoums for our Lori... I will have to figure out a way to rejoin our group, and go back into teaching same...

OMG, Ford...this was wonderful...and your poem made me want to do more with pantoums...they bring such a rhythm and sound to word unheard except in one's mind, and this, Sir, you did with such apparent ease, as if it tripped off your tongue!

Do you talk to friends in common moments, in rhyme?

I think you do!

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