Open Poetry #47 |
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Definitive Blue |
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Dr.Moose1 Member Elite
since 1999-09-05
Posts 3448Bewilderment , USA |
No degree of perception's apt to change things for you It's a hopeless condition once you know this is true They've confirmed your suspicions but left you with no clue How this loss that you're feeling could so devastate you Down so low, even down's like a room with a view then the world that you know is definitive blue Victimized by deception slapped and beat and ill used You've been maimed by rejection kicked and punched and abused Racked and torn by infection had your heart pierced right through Stripped of all recollection of the love you once knew Down so low even down's like a room with a view then the world that you know is definitive blue There's no joy to be found matters not what you do Beat down low as the dirt 'neath the sole of a shoe That black cloud over head just keeps followin' you Down so low even down's like a room with a view then the world that you know is definitive blue. |
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© Copyright 2011 William E.Kleist - All Rights Reserved | |||
Margherita Member Seraphic
since 2003-02-08
Posts 22236Eternity |
If your intent was to depict a hopeless condition then you really fully succeeded. Tough, tough and it hurts. Definitive Blue, oh, so sad! My optimistic attitude rebels against that "definitive" of course and I sure wish that the sun will shine again in the life of the one you write of. Excellent in its gloom. M |
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Balladeer
Administrator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-06-05
Posts 25505Ft. Lauderdale, Fl USA |
Well, that's because you blue it, Doc! ![]() |
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Dr.Moose1 Member Elite
since 1999-09-05
Posts 3448Bewilderment , USA |
Margherita, Thanks so much for stopping in, maybe I should have clarified. While I can certainly understand this kind of blue, having been there before, this was just an attempt to write a blues song, which I've been listening to a lot lately. Doc Balladeer, Lol, guess this is what happens when you "blues" it too much. Doc |
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Marchmadness Member Rara Avis
since 2007-09-16
Posts 9271So. El Monte, California |
This would be an excellent blues song, Dr. Moose. Sad but very well written. Ida |
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Dr.Moose1 Member Elite
since 1999-09-05
Posts 3448Bewilderment , USA |
Ida, Thanks, music is an integral part of who I am, unfortunately, I can't play a note,lol. Doc |
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Alison![]() ![]() ![]() ![]()
since 2008-01-27
Posts 9318Lumpy oatmeal makes me crazy! |
I hear this as blues music and came back to listen again. A |
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Dr.Moose1 Member Elite
since 1999-09-05
Posts 3448Bewilderment , USA |
Alison, Thanks, so far, the responses from most of the top blues artists have been sorely lacking, I'll let you know if I get a song writing gig, lol. Doc |
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