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navwin » Archives » Open Poetry #45 » Hope Again
Open Poetry #45
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HopeAgain
Junior Member
since 2009-12-06
Posts 11
Toronto, Canada
0 posted 2009-12-11 05:24 PM


Hope again

When there is no rain
& the ocean has dried
when there is not a hand
& every rose has died

When there is pain in every breath
& your heart has grown so weak
When you have lost your voice
& can no longer speak

When life loses its sweetness
& every dream is fading away
when you can no longer move
& all you are is a portray

When there is no more light
& the sun has set
when life seems meaningless
& your filled with regret

Hope again . . .
© Copyright 2009 HopeAgain - All Rights Reserved
Margherita
Member Seraphic
since 2003-02-08
Posts 22236
Eternity
1 posted 2009-12-11 07:02 PM

With these premises it isn't easy to not lose hope, but of hope we do live and go ahead even under the worst circumstances, no doubt.

This is nicely done, but I suggest you do not use & instead of "and", it interrupts the flow of words.

Love,
Margherita
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navwin » Archives » Open Poetry #45 » Hope Again

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