Open Poetry #45 |
The Ballad Of Yoin |
Yoinn Senior Member
since 2007-08-16
Posts 649Michigan |
The Ballad Of Yoin It eats me, it eats me bad. Throwing my hands high, I attempt to implode the memories once again, and fail again. There will never be resolution. I think back to the first time I saw you and how stolen from that one innocent moment was a need, a yearning for each other that could never be denied. How intense we were for each other, how ravenous. Two people, living on the edge, finding a haven from the onslaught of their tortured lives. But, like opposite sides of the same coin, we were one, but could never be together. Only in the shadows of the secrets we kept could our colors be hidden. We saw the tragedy coming, felt it coming with a roar, like a train wreck that couldn’t be stopped. So with our passion alive and dripping from our chins, we turned and faced it. Part 2 I pleaded for you to stop, to change before it was to late. You only smiled and talked about choices, and lack of them. And when it happened, when it all exploded, small animals scurried back to their homes. The crows took wing on the morning air and a lonely warrior prayed for his redemption. The wheels of our passion had jumped the track And the tragedy that we had become, chewed up the earth like an angry force of nature. There on the ground, you looked up at me and whispered my innocence. I held you, I looked into your eyes and my heart stopped when yours did. It eats me, it eats me bad. PART 3 He hides his pain, forces it down in his discipline, and asks why their eyes are cast away. He swallows apathy meals that are fed to him, a victim of a social bulldozer. Intensity and rage fester behind his eyes. Speak to him never of false compassion or men in suits who chew on lies like bubble gum and blow them pink in his face. They wait with stones and blackballs of blame, to be thrown and fell him low and lonely. His dreams, nothing but rose petals for the important to trod on so as not to sully their time with the truth. Once he was a beautiful man. EPILOGUE Standing in the rain buried under the cold ground I still remember. CLOSE Yoin ( yoh EEN) is the Japanese word for any kind of moving experience that causes profound emotional reverberations. [This message has been edited by Yoinn (06-23-2009 02:30 AM).] |
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Clang Member
since 2005-12-15
Posts 222 |
I come here several times nearly every day, but I rarely post. You paint very evocative pieces that describe similar codes within myself. I wish I had your talent for depiction and disclosure. Absolutely beautifully done. I am a fan. |
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nakdthoughts Member Laureate
since 2000-10-29
Posts 19200Between the Lines |
"He hides his pain, forces it down in his discipline, and asks why their eyes are cast away. He swallows apathy meals that are fed to him, a victim of a social bulldozer. Intensity and rage fester behind his eyes. Speak to him never of false compassion or men in suits who chew on lies like bubble gum and blow them pink in his face. They wait with stones and blackballs of blame, to be thrown and fell him low and lonely. His dreams, nothing but rose petals for the important to trod on so as not to sully their time with the truth. " wow...some great lines of truth here... M |
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Yoinn Senior Member
since 2007-08-16
Posts 649Michigan |
Clang, I don't embellish at all when I say that it means the world to me that this poem reached you on a deep level. It has't always been so but is now the reason why I write and post my poetry. Depression is a wicked and ferocious beast that is very hard to tame. It is my belief that no one is ever cured of depression, we just build up our coping mechanisms to keep it at bay. Appreciating the beauty in life. Accepting that we are not only the person we were in the past but are recreating ourselves every time the sun rises. It is this constant building up of ourselves that calms the depression beast. Be happy my friend. Yoin |
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Yoinn Senior Member
since 2007-08-16
Posts 649Michigan |
thank you nakdthoughts, Truth is what I strive for. Yoin |
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brneyedgrly Senior Member
since 2009-06-08
Posts 1125nowhere and everywhere |
The wheels of our passion had jumped the track And the tragedy that we had become, chewed up the earth like an angry force of nature. There on the ground, you looked up at me and whispered my innocence. I held you, I looked into your eyes and my heart stopped when yours did. It eats me, it eats me bad. ~i feel you, yo... : ) |
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Margherita Member Seraphic
since 2003-02-08
Posts 22236Eternity |
quote: So intense! The quoted stanza made me think of Neda, the Iranian girl killed in Teheran ... if it read "your innocence" ... sorry for deviating, but your beautiful verse just fits that tragedy so well. I appreciate you very much. Love, Margherita |
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ThisDiamond Member Rara Avis
since 2002-02-22
Posts 9353Michigan, USA |
This is off the chain! Excellent imagery, pounding tempo and excellent storyline. This kind of raw emotion is cathartic and unusually honest in its presentation. Well done. I am a fan as well! |
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Mysteria
since 2001-03-07
Posts 18328British Columbia, Canada |
I too am a fan. You are so right, we just go from day to day re-inventing ourselves. |
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Yoinn Senior Member
since 2007-08-16
Posts 649Michigan |
Thank you all for your wonderful replies. I really am not surrounded by artistic people much in my life. So sometimes I stray away from my poetry. When ever I come back here to passions, the flame is relit and I enjoy my art once again. Thanks to you all for keeping my poetry flame alive with your replies. Yoin |
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brneyedgrly Senior Member
since 2009-06-08
Posts 1125nowhere and everywhere |
yo this is intense and intelligent and i feel like it is your best writing so i want people to see it again love you, shel my mind won't rest and I don't sleep... |
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angellea Member
since 2009-03-29
Posts 144NC, USA |
well, you have certainly stirred my emotions, yoinn. such a powerful and intense piece. maranda |
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Earth Angel Member Empyrean
since 2002-08-27
Posts 40215Realms of Light |
"We saw the tragedy coming, felt it coming with a roar, like a train wreck that couldn’t be stopped." ~ This entire poem was an emotional train ride for me, however, the aformentioned lines had the greatedst impact for me. I felt them in the pit of my stomach as I recall a similar experience. Your poetry has the power to move its readers. EA |
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vandana
since 1999-10-22
Posts 10463USA |
enjoyed |
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Yoinn Senior Member
since 2007-08-16
Posts 649Michigan |
thank you angellea, Im always glad when i stir a little something up in someone yoin |
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Yoinn Senior Member
since 2007-08-16
Posts 649Michigan |
EA, as always i really am glad for your replies. thank you very much Yoin |
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Yoinn Senior Member
since 2007-08-16
Posts 649Michigan |
thank you vandanna. Yoin Just reworked my old poetry page. Check it out before geocities takes it down. Yoin |
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