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Open Poetry #45

Unclaimed

martiniat8
Senior Member

since 2003-06-21

Posts 897
Prague, Bohemia, Czech Republic

0 posted 2009-10-17 05:45 PM

She used to follow my every line
drew close

and closer

and without word
retreated

into the mist

for reasons
unknown

the writer
left

reeling

was it a critique
was it a statement

his heart

belonged to someone
and it does

remain...

Lori Grosser Rhoden
Member Patricius

since 2009-10-10

Posts 10202
Fair to middlin' of nowhere

1 posted 2009-10-17 08:12 PM

Better to be "unclaimed" and alone than to be "claimed" and alone....but not by much, that was a painful read. ~L

2islander2
Member Ascendant

since 2008-03-12

Posts 6825
by the sea

2 posted 2009-10-18 03:59 AM

Hello Martiniat, thanks for the thoughtful and emotional poem, enjoyed your feelings and words.

regards

yann

AncientHippie
Member

since 2009-10-15

Posts 411
Surfing the Cosmic Flow

3 posted 2009-10-18 08:45 PM

I love the form of the poem, martiniat8. The paucity of words adds greatly to the poignancy of the work. Very finely crafted.
Namaste

Sutra 3: See your reality for what it is, not for what you think it is: this is the first step to making your reality what you wish it to be.
--Jim's

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