Open Poetry #45 |
A Study in Drowning |
Alwye
Moderator
Member Elite
since 1999-06-16
Posts 3850In the space between moments |
The river plays a lilting requiem only I can hear as I gaze up through its opalescent waters to the bright flickerings of the day. Tiny fish flit past, their silver skitterings enchanting. Smooth scales graze my outstretched fingertips and kiss my bluish cheeks as I sink further into cobalt dark. My lungs scorch in airless pain, a panicked fire in icy waters but soon enough the river paints me with the cool acceptance of fate. I rest now in aqueous mud my hair tangled in green weeds and bones, limbs tingling out the last of my conscious thoughts as slowly, quietly, dreamily I am gone. ~*Krista Botterill*~ |
||
© Copyright 2009 Krista Botterill - All Rights Reserved | |||
Earth Angel Member Empyrean
since 2002-08-27
Posts 40215Realms of Light |
...It's taking me a while to think of an appropreated response. Let me start by saying that you wrote this beautifully. A fine piece of poetry. It's a unique and unusual subject and I was actually beginning to feel as though I was drowning. Wake up, dear Alwye, wake up! Linda |
||
brneyedgrly Senior Member
since 2009-06-08
Posts 1125nowhere and everywhere |
alwye I think this is excellent very strong images shellie |
||
Ingrediants New Member
since 2009-09-13
Posts 8 |
Wow, i liked this alot. I could visual the entire poem. I think its the beauty that follows the girl as well as in her death which kept me reading. Very awesome job! |
||
Margherita Member Seraphic
since 2003-02-08
Posts 22236Eternity |
Visions of Ophelia came into mind here. This is an excellent write, even though drowning is certainly no peaceful experience, you succeed in bringing breath back in the end, because you use ... "quietly, dreamily ....". A treat to read. Love, Margherita |
||
Alwye
Moderator
Member Elite
since 1999-06-16
Posts 3850In the space between moments |
The idea of writing about such a scary thing with more objectivity and beauty was intriguing to me--so I gave it a try. I kind of like the result. Margherita--I was thinking of Ophelia too as I was writing. It seems we are on the same wavelength. Thanks for the kind words everyone. I know the subject matter is a little strange--but for some reason, I was drawn to it. Ophelia must be speaking to me. ~*Krista Botterill*~ |
||
⇧ top of page ⇧ | ||
All times are ET (US). All dates are in Year-Month-Day format. |