navwin » Archives » Open Poetry #45 » Silence of the Stars
Open Poetry #45
Post A Reply Post New Topic Silence of the Stars Go to Previous / Newer Topic Back to Topic List Go to Next / Older Topic
Chalmette Guy
Senior Member
since 2009-03-11
Posts 1257
Louisiana

0 posted 2009-08-27 08:21 AM


You come and go as you traverse the sky
Oceans apart still we never shall fall
United beyond what passes these eyes
For no Earthly sum would we miss it all
From beginnings until ending’s sad sound
We never asked for anything like this
Just to keep heads in air and feet on ground
But we betrayed ourselves with a first kiss
Someday became one day then just never
As the noise grew louder, hands to my ears
The pain grew greater as I remembered
That the loudest sound was us with you here

Your beauty has been compared to the stars,
Your absence is the silence that they are


© Copyright 2009 Chalmette Guy - All Rights Reserved
Jeffrey Carter
Deputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 Tour
Member Elite
since 2000-04-08
Posts 2367
State of constant confusion!
1 posted 2009-08-27 08:37 AM


Just beautiful, the last two lines especially took a good grip on my heart
Greeneyes
Deputy Moderator 50 ToursDeputy Moderator 10 ToursDeputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 Tour
Member Rara Avis
since 2000-09-09
Posts 9903
In Your Poetic Mind
2 posted 2009-08-27 03:56 PM


sigh.....such a heavenly creature that roams your poems....

~~**~~
I never let one moment define me,
I define myself by all moments and how they teach and touch me......02  

Margherita
Member Seraphic
since 2003-02-08
Posts 22236
Eternity
3 posted 2009-08-27 04:29 PM


You have such a beautiful poetic spirit. This holds quivering emotions.

Love,
Margherita

Midnitesun
Deputy Moderator 1 Tour
Member Empyrean
since 2001-05-18
Posts 28647
Gaia
4 posted 2009-08-27 05:01 PM


Perfect ending, Jer!
Bill Charles
Member Patricius
since 2000-07-11
Posts 10619
highways, & byways, for now
5 posted 2009-08-27 05:59 PM


Chalmette Guy - the poem is great, but the last two lines are amazing...

BC

Sunshine
Administrator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-06-25
Posts 63354
Listening to every heart
6 posted 2009-08-27 07:20 PM


From beginnings until ending’s sad sound
We never asked for anything like this
Just to keep heads in air and feet on ground
But we betrayed ourselves with a first kiss

~&~

All of the poem is remarkable, as only you
can bring justice to such;
remarkable the feel and presence, as if it
were a first touch.



Well done, m'friend.

Very well done.


ThisDiamond
Member Rara Avis
since 2002-02-22
Posts 9353
Michigan, USA
7 posted 2009-08-28 10:59 AM


Gorgeous
peaceseaker
Member
since 2009-07-29
Posts 161

8 posted 2009-08-28 03:18 PM


Hi....Some great emotions and thoughts in this...well done...I loved the last 2 lines...

"Your beauty has been compared to the stars,
Your absence is the silence that they are"

peaceseaker

martiniat8
Senior Member
since 2003-06-21
Posts 897
Prague, Bohemia, Czech Republic
9 posted 2009-08-28 03:23 PM


yeah the last 2 lines are truly stellar
kindredspirit
Member
since 2009-05-19
Posts 156

10 posted 2009-08-31 02:42 PM


Tis' better to have loved and lost then to have never loved at all.
Beautifully written.

brneyedgrly
Senior Member
since 2009-06-08
Posts 1125
nowhere and everywhere
11 posted 2009-09-02 06:25 PM



beautiful  


BluesSerenade
Member Patricius
since 2001-10-23
Posts 10549
By the Seaside
12 posted 2009-09-04 10:40 PM


This is so moving and full of feelings.

Love this beauty, one of your very best, guy~~


Artic Wind
Member Rara Avis
since 2007-09-16
Posts 8080
Realm of Supernatural
13 posted 2009-09-05 12:28 PM


Your poems have this perfect poetic touch. Just wonderful to read, even more than twice!


ARCTIC WIND

Post A Reply Post New Topic ⇧ top of page ⇧ Go to Previous / Newer Topic Back to Topic List Go to Next / Older Topic
All times are ET (US). All dates are in Year-Month-Day format.
navwin » Archives » Open Poetry #45 » Silence of the Stars

Passions in Poetry | pipTalk Home Page | Main Poetry Forums | 100 Best Poems

How to Join | Member's Area / Help | Private Library | Search | Contact Us | Login
Discussion | Tech Talk | Archives | Sanctuary