Teen Poetry #9 |
Memories (revised) |
freeand2sexy Senior Member
since 2008-09-12
Posts 704CA, USA |
I think I still need to work on the ending, so let me know what you think. Memories migrate into my thoughts. They bring the childhood Where sliced lemons were doused in salt, And boundary lines were thin, So that even with the screams and stings Of our chapped lips, The sour excitement Was still sucked out. It left us parched And not yet satisfied, so We skipped on slippery grass, Felt rain drops scamper down The scaly skin Of our elbows, And felt the freeing cold, As a mom was on the edge, Panicking yet again, That we could simply, hit our heads. We were not attentive To her fear, Fearless, until We heard the keys upon worn out jeans, Of a man, Who smiled a bit too big And whistled a little too loud, And as he came near We ran, paranoid By the stories we were told, Of men kidnapping kids Who were yet again to be seen, So we avoided the smiling man And his worn out jeans. The hardest part about writing poetry, |
||
© Copyright 2009 Christine Juarez - All Rights Reserved | |||
moonbeam
since 2005-12-24
Posts 2356 |
Pretty damned good job Christine . I would write more but just have to get some sleep. Maybe tomorrow. Well done. |
||
Falling rain
since 2008-01-31
Posts 2178Small town, Illinois |
Wow Christina. I couldn't even write something like this. It's really good and one of my favorites. I really love the first stanza over all. |
||
freeand2sexy Senior Member
since 2008-09-12
Posts 704CA, USA |
Thanks! The hardest part about writing poetry, |
||
⇧ top of page ⇧ | ||
All times are ET (US). All dates are in Year-Month-Day format. |