Teen Poetry #9 |
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Free-Write |
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Falling rain![]() ![]() ![]()
since 2008-01-31
Posts 2178Small town, Illinois ![]() |
Okay this free write is me going out on a limb. And I noticed how I have like no happy poems. Its really sad how the only feeling I can write about is sorrow.. Lost within my crystal shards Memories lay at my feet Drowning in pools of tears That I cry silent at night Tongue-tied from lies I spoke Self esteem worn so low Dragging feet across pavement Have no clue where to go Thoughts searching for some sense Grasping smoke filled reason Living everyday like the same Don't know how to be free from this |
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© Copyright 2009 Zach Booker-Scott - All Rights Reserved | |||
GothicCherry Member
since 2008-09-16
Posts 471TN |
Sorrow. Yeah that sounds like a good word for them. I guess once one has been through so much sorrow it begins to consume them. Maybe you could help your poems a little by adding structure. Like sentences or commas to seperate thoughts and emotions. |
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Falling rain![]() ![]() ![]()
since 2008-01-31
Posts 2178Small town, Illinois |
To be honest structure is the least of my worries right now.. |
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GothicCherry Member
since 2008-09-16
Posts 471TN |
Yea I can bet on that one. Pretty much tha same thing here... |
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freeand2sexy Senior Member
since 2008-09-12
Posts 704CA, USA |
I really like this, I saw a lot of emotion, and I don't think freewrites are meant to be critiqued, so that's all I'll say about that. I personally think, no matter who you are or what you've been through, it's just easier to write about sorrow and saddness, especially if that's how you feel at the moment. No, I'm not conceited, 2sexy doesn't mean "too sexy", it means something else! |
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GothicCherry Member
since 2008-09-16
Posts 471TN |
I think darkness and BLAH are easiest to write about. && yeaa.. I just said tha structure thing cuz what we were txting about Zack. idr now tho. |
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