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Teen Poetry #9

Maybe Peace Will Come

GothicCherry
Member

since 2008-09-16

Posts 471
TN

0 posted 2009-01-26 04:54 PM

Sometimes, I think I’ve been blind.
Maybe I was always covering up the wrongs.
Maybe I’ve never really had any good friends.
Sometimes, I just feel left behind.

Everyday, my life spins faster.
Maybe I was in slow motion before.
Maybe I was running so fast I never knew.
Everyday, finds my heart in plaster.

This time, I’m building confidence.
Maybe I could see the people in the masks.
Maybe revealing the soul will help me move on.
This time, will make more sense.

Now, I can ditch the drama at last.
Maybe I’ll find serenity in the presence of solitude.
Maybe peace comes with living away from influence.
Now, to live without the haunting past.

freeand2sexy
Senior Member

since 2008-09-12

Posts 704
CA, USA

1 posted 2009-01-27 07:06 PM

Very good write, i can relate

With God I am happy; sadness has no say in my life.

Falling rain

Member Elite

since 2008-01-31

Posts 2178
Small town, Illinois

2 posted 2009-01-27 09:10 PM

This was pretty good!

Only thing that bugged me while reading this was you said "maybe" a lot. Personally I don't like repeating the same word over and over.

But other then that this poem was pretty good!

-Zach

When I see your smile, and I know it’s not for me, that’s when I’ll miss you.

GothicCherry
Member

since 2008-09-16

Posts 471
TN

3 posted 2009-01-27 09:17 PM

Thanks!! I normally don't repeat myself a lot, but everything was so indefinite to me while writing this that it just seemed natural..

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