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Dark Poetry #5
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| Dark Poetry #5 |
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future |
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LaGraceLa Member
since 2011-01-30
Posts 243Minnesota, USA |
Since all love has gone away hate and fear will come to stay to take all light from the day to make us cry, to make us pay. Since all hope has left us here it dies and quickly turns to fear to make us realize death is near & to show us there is no cure. |
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| © Copyright 2011 Sarah Grace - All Rights Reserved | |||
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XGarapanX Senior Member
since 2008-06-19
Posts 1435Antarctica |
How very morbid. I like. Kinda says it like it is. ·´~`·»Garapan«·´~`· "Look! Crumbs on his jacketses... Heeee took it!" |
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fractal007 Senior Member
since 2000-06-01
Posts 1958 |
The rhyming is nice and tight. The poem is definitely morbid. As far as critiques go I think I'd be more inclined to question the poem's message more than its layout. Sometimes when you accept a loss of hope or love you can actually find greater hope in yourself. This is especially true of those thunks we all have, when we feel like there's no meaning in life. That sense tends, if you let it, to give rise to a sense of freedom. If no one is giving us a meaning in life and if it will end in a meaningless death then why not enjoy for its own sake the pleasure of creating or of loving others etc? Just a thought. |
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