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Open Poetry #43
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The Sun Fairy
| Open Poetry #43 |
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The Sun Fairy |
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Artic Wind Member Rara Avis
since 2007-09-16
Posts 8080Realm of Supernatural |
 The Sun Fairy At break of day, the golden sun rises, above the vast valleys of fuchsia red. Butterflies flitter as little birds twitter, around the Sun Fairy’s bed. She lights up the sky, in an endless glow, across plains of our mother earth. Trees soak in the light, that shines so bright, --The warmth ensures nature’s rebirth. When Moon Fairy awakes ~ Sun Fairy will sleep, --Until the next breaking of dawn. ARCTIC WIND [This message has been edited by Artic Wind (07-22-2008 12:12 PM).] |
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Robert E. Jordan Member Rara Avis
since 2008-01-25
Posts 8541Philadelphia, Pennsylvania |
Yo Artic Wind, This is pretty good. I'd get rid of the "do", and put a period after "rebirth". bobby |
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Roniece Dawson-Bruce Member Ascendant
since 2000-01-29
Posts 5689Sydney, Australia |
When Moon Fairy awakes ~ Sun Fairy will sleep, --Until the next breaking of dawn. oh Michael, this is just beautiful!! Fairies are such a wondrous gifting to us! love RDB Be kind at heart....for everyone you meet has their own battle to fight......... |
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LindsayP Member Elite
since 2007-07-28
Posts 3410Australia, Victoria |
Great poem Michael, great rhyming And seeing as Bobby said to get rid of the do, I would suggest the following line. Butterflys flitter as little birds twitter It keeps the meter right. I hope you are not offended by my comments as I learned long ago not to change other poets poems, so please forgive me. Lindsay |
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Margherita Member Seraphic
since 2003-02-08
Posts 22236Eternity |
How sweet and enchanting, dear Michael! A keeper, so that I can read it to my grandsons when they will understand English. "... and little birds twitter" ... yes I agree with these kind suggestions. Oh, and I love the picture too! Love and joy! Margherita  |
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Artic Wind Member Rara Avis
since 2007-09-16
Posts 8080Realm of Supernatural |
Bobby- Why thank you for the suggestion on the "do" Part And thank you for reading! ARCTIC WIND |
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Artic Wind Member Rara Avis
since 2007-09-16
Posts 8080Realm of Supernatural |
RDB- Thanks!-- I am soooooo glad that you liked this poem I wrote... ARCTIC WIND |
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Artic Wind Member Rara Avis
since 2007-09-16
Posts 8080Realm of Supernatural |
Lindsay! Thank you for the suggestion as well!.. All is switched and ready to be read ARCTIC WIND |
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Artic Wind Member Rara Avis
since 2007-09-16
Posts 8080Realm of Supernatural |
Margherita! Thanks for the help! and thanks for reading  ARCTIC WIND |
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Ericc Member Elite
since 2003-01-31
Posts 4178 |
Wonderful write! Eric |
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Artic Wind Member Rara Avis
since 2007-09-16
Posts 8080Realm of Supernatural |
Eric- Thank you! ARCTIC WIND |
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amusemi Senior Member
since 2001-12-08
Posts 1262A State of Disarray |
A wonderfully celestial depiction... enjoyed! |
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Prasad Nataraj Senior Member
since 2008-05-29
Posts 1149Bangalore,India |
Hi Artic Wind, excellent painting with words, I can see the fairy right in front of me. Prasad |
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Alison 
since 2008-01-27
Posts 9318Lumpy oatmeal makes me crazy! |
Lovely - sometimes I prefer to read without the graphic as I see your poetry in my mind. Very nice one. A |
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Artic Wind Member Rara Avis
since 2007-09-16
Posts 8080Realm of Supernatural |
Amuse! Thank you so much! ARCTIC WIND |
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Artic Wind Member Rara Avis
since 2007-09-16
Posts 8080Realm of Supernatural |
Prasad! WOW! thanks ARCTIC WIND |
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Artic Wind Member Rara Avis
since 2007-09-16
Posts 8080Realm of Supernatural |
Alison! REALLY LOL thanks! I am glad you like to picture what it's like! ARCTIC WIND |
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XGarapanX Senior Member
since 2008-06-19
Posts 1435Antarctica |
Missed this one in my absence. This blew across like an arctic wind ·´~`·»Garapan«·´~`· |
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Artic Wind Member Rara Avis
since 2007-09-16
Posts 8080Realm of Supernatural |
Garapen- Thank you so much! ARCTIC WIND |
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Earth Angel Member Empyrean
since 2002-08-27
Posts 40215Realms of Light |
Our world would not be as near as bright if we were not to have our Sun and Moon Fairies.  Enchanting! Love & Fairy Magic, EA  |
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Artic Wind Member Rara Avis
since 2007-09-16
Posts 8080Realm of Supernatural |
EA- Thank you for the Enchanting Reply! LOL ARCTIC WIND |
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Gaelynsgirl Member
since 2008-07-18
Posts 175Ont. Canada |
Imagine the poets-to-be that you are inspiring. I was raised on Robert Louis Stevenson and this put me in mind of my childhood and the land of counterpane! 'I do believe in fairies!!! I do, I do!' from 'Peter Pan' You make me believe... Lynda |
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Artic Wind Member Rara Avis
since 2007-09-16
Posts 8080Realm of Supernatural |
Gaelyn! Why thank you! I love the story "Peter Pan" as well... ARCTIC WIND |
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Marchmadness Member Rara Avis
since 2007-09-16
Posts 9271So. El Monte, California |
Very pretty, Artic Wind. Ida |
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ramisf Member
since 2007-05-17
Posts 93 |
What you wrote is great. keep it up |
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Artic Wind Member Rara Avis
since 2007-09-16
Posts 8080Realm of Supernatural |
Marchmadness- Thank you so much! ARCTIC WIND |
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Artic Wind Member Rara Avis
since 2007-09-16
Posts 8080Realm of Supernatural |
ramsif- Thanks ARCTIC WIND |
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