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Open Poetry #43
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Pantheress
Member
since 2008-11-02
Posts 215
Queensland, Australia

0 posted 2008-11-12 11:50 PM



They say if you look in the bible,
The word it'll come unto you.
Just ask and your questions are answered,
in phrases so perfect and true.

I went to the preacher one Sunday,
a question was troubling me.
But when he heard what I wanted to know,
he got up and walked out on me.

Can you get laid up in heaven?
It's something I just got to know.
Can you get laid up in heaven, my friend,
If you can't , then I don't want to go.

Now it may be an asinine question,
it may be it's not very nice.
But when there's something you just got to know,
you look for the best advice.

I went to the salvation army.
Their kindly assistance is free.
There was no screaming, or leaving the room,
they simply declared war on me.

Can you get laid up in heaven?
It's something I just got to know.
Can you get laid up in heaven, my friend,
If you can't , then I don't want to go.



© Copyright 2008 Daphnejean. F. - All Rights Reserved
americangothic
Junior Member
since 2008-11-11
Posts 45

1 posted 2008-11-12 11:55 PM


I'm still working on getting laid here on earth ..lol....good piece
Pantheress
Member
since 2008-11-02
Posts 215
Queensland, Australia
2 posted 2008-11-13 12:04 PM


Awww.. americangothic.. You cracked me up, I laughed so hard I cried, Good on you,smiles..
Robert E. Jordan
Member Rara Avis
since 2008-01-25
Posts 8541
Philadelphia, Pennsylvania
3 posted 2008-11-13 12:18 PM


Yo Pantheress,

Of course you can get laid up in heaven.  It's my understanding that if that's what you want to do, then they're all for it.

The only thing that you can't do in heaven is go around willy-nilly eating apples when you damned well please.  You might check with Adam and Eve on that one.

Bobby

Marchmadness
Member Rara Avis
since 2007-09-16
Posts 9271
So. El Monte, California
4 posted 2008-11-13 02:58 AM


Well, You've heard about those 72 (or is it 76) (whatever) virgins haven't you?
                            Ida

Roniece Dawson-Bruce
Member Ascendant
since 2000-01-29
Posts 5689
Sydney, Australia
5 posted 2008-11-13 03:40 AM


LOL!!!  oh I do like your humor here!!   it is humor right??  LOL!!!  love RDB

Be kind at heart....for everyone you meet has their own battle to fight.........

Dark Stranger
Member Patricius
since 2001-03-19
Posts 13631
West Coast
6 posted 2008-11-13 06:19 AM


I would say if you don't make it to heaven you are screwed..so perhaps you will be ok either way?
Pantheress
Member
since 2008-11-02
Posts 215
Queensland, Australia
7 posted 2008-11-13 06:21 AM


Apples.. You get apples but ya can't eat them? Virgins? You get virgins and ya can't... Naa.. I haven't heard.. 72/76.. Oh pray.. Do tell!chuckles.. Humour?? Come on? Do I sound like I'm joking?smiles..
Thanks to you all for shinning so bright in my world, You make me smile..

Balladeer
Administrator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-06-05
Posts 25505
Ft. Lauderdale, Fl USA
8 posted 2008-11-13 07:50 AM


Some worry about getting laid
When they go up yonder
While others are still wondering
If they can get laid down under

Pantheress
Member
since 2008-11-02
Posts 215
Queensland, Australia
9 posted 2008-11-13 08:12 AM


Hi Dark Stranger.. your poems are so deliciously wicked.. Balladeer the replies on this poem make me laugh,  I'm so glad you both called on by and shared your humour,smiles..

viking_metal
Senior Member
since 2007-02-02
Posts 1337
In a Jeep, Minnesota.
10 posted 2008-11-13 04:02 PM


I agree with your poem. Hurrah!

Some people fall in love and touch the sky, some people fall in love and find quicksand.

shortsleeves
Member
since 2008-10-19
Posts 125
Franklin Tennessee
11 posted 2008-11-13 05:34 PM


I guess it depends on where you think heaven is...
Great poem! I appreciate your comment on Diversity as well.
Hal

Pantheress
Member
since 2008-11-02
Posts 215
Queensland, Australia
12 posted 2008-11-13 05:36 PM


Hi viking_metal, Thanks for reading my silly little rhyme,smiles.. I'm sure it'll be a grand place to be,smiles.. although I'm not sure if they'll let me through the door,grins..
viking_metal
Senior Member
since 2007-02-02
Posts 1337
In a Jeep, Minnesota.
13 posted 2008-11-13 06:28 PM


You can hide in my suitcase. Go team getting laid in heaven!

Some people fall in love and touch the sky, some people fall in love and find quicksand.

vandana
Deputy Moderator 5 Tours
Member Patricius
since 1999-10-22
Posts 10463
USA
14 posted 2008-11-13 06:42 PM


enjoyed
LindsayP
Member Elite
since 2007-07-28
Posts 3410
Australia, Victoria
15 posted 2008-11-13 08:03 PM



I sure got a laugh out of this one Pantheress. Great rhyming, enjoyed.

Lindsay

Pilgrimage
Member Elite
since 2001-12-04
Posts 3945
Texas, USA
16 posted 2008-11-13 08:58 PM


Gee, I really couldn't say.  Aunt Mildred was laid up with the roomatiz awful bad last week, and Uncle Henry was laid up with a bad back for purt-near a month last Spring. They're not in Heaven yet, though.

Nan (Pilgrim variety)

Pantheress
Member
since 2008-11-02
Posts 215
Queensland, Australia
17 posted 2008-11-14 12:23 PM


Your welcome shortsleeves, I like how you write,smiles.. Thanks for taking the time to reply to mine..
vandana thanks for calling in, I'm glad you enjoyed my little rhyme.
Hi Lindsay.. I feel that's high praise from you, the poems on life you write are astounding.
Oh.. Pilgrimage, I hope Aunt Mildred an Uncle Henry are not still feeling poorly.. I'm sure there's no rush, we'll all find out.. if we get through the door,smiles..

In your suitcase? you pack for the trip?? I thought we where supplied wings for the trip,chuckles..

viking_metal
Senior Member
since 2007-02-02
Posts 1337
In a Jeep, Minnesota.
18 posted 2008-11-14 05:32 PM


WIngs and other things... HAhahahaaa...


This will get way too dirty for open poetry real quick. Sigh.

Some people fall in love and touch the sky, some people fall in love and find quicksand.

Bill Charles
Member Patricius
since 2000-07-11
Posts 10619
highways, & byways, for now
19 posted 2008-11-14 05:44 PM


Pantheress - H'mmmmm, isn't there 182 virgins just a waiting? I'm hoping...

BC

viking_metal
Senior Member
since 2007-02-02
Posts 1337
In a Jeep, Minnesota.
20 posted 2008-11-14 06:52 PM


Like I said... Haha....


Some people fall in love and touch the sky, some people fall in love and find quicksand.

Pantheress
Member
since 2008-11-02
Posts 215
Queensland, Australia
21 posted 2008-11-14 08:26 PM


Why do men prefer virgins??
they can't handle criticism or competition,grins..
182? Mmmmm..I know nothing,smiles..
Thanks to all you beautiful people for call by,smiles..
lets keep the party clean..chuckles..

viking_metal
Senior Member
since 2007-02-02
Posts 1337
In a Jeep, Minnesota.
22 posted 2008-11-14 08:56 PM


(Like I said... )

Some people fall in love and touch the sky, some people fall in love and find quicksand.

Huan Yi
Member Ascendant
since 2004-10-12
Posts 6688
Waukegan
23 posted 2008-11-14 09:08 PM


.

P

Actually
you may want to be
Moslem

There
according to the imams

the men
have perpetual
hard-ons

Bon appétit

John

.

Pantheress
Member
since 2008-11-02
Posts 215
Queensland, Australia
24 posted 2008-11-16 07:34 PM


Thanks for calling by John,smiles..
A Muslim huh?.. Food for thought,chuckles..

Ethan Halo
Senior Member
since 2000-04-28
Posts 793
on the roof again
25 posted 2008-11-19 09:05 PM


knowing my luck, if i get promised eleventy hundred virgins, i'd show up to heaven and it'd  come true.

it'd be a bunch of star trek geeks.
male star trek geeks.

The soul is oftentimes a battlefield where reason and judgement wage war on passion and appetite.

Pantheress
Member
since 2008-11-02
Posts 215
Queensland, Australia
26 posted 2008-11-20 12:40 PM


Hi Ethan Halo, Male star trek virgins, you have an interesting, active imagination,smiles.. and your problem with that would be??chuckles.. thanks for calling by and taking the time to reply, is great,smiles..

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