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steavenr
Member Elite

since 2003-11-17

Posts 4058

0 posted 2008-10-30 05:57 PM

creaking door the silence breaks
in setting sun the shadows form
peace is robbed, its casting makes
a throb-like thunder in a spook-filled storm

eyes beckon attention to a haunting sound
as golden auras are strongly smashed
while none who've entered can be found
and hopes of safety's schemes are bashed

crumpling caution's net of calm
sprinkling doubts like settling sand
pouring night-fears into shaking palms
shaken by scares like a fire fanned

the hinges cry like a banshee blast
louder it seems as the night grows dark
surely unseen like a spell that's cast
a cat's low screech, a dog's cold bark

and the silent scream of ghost gone wild
and then..."trick or treat" is heard from a wee l'il child

Janette

Member Elite

since 2001-07-20

Posts 2843
Chicagoland for now

1 posted 2008-10-30 08:15 PM

"crumpling caution's net of calm"

I especially liked that phrase, very cool.

This piece perfectly sets the stage for that spooky seasonal night, Halloween.

A chilling great read!

Enjoyed

Janette

always seeking joy, adventure and romance and wishing you find the same

Robert E. Jordan
Member Rara Avis

since 2008-01-25

Posts 8541
Philadelphia, Pennsylvania

2 posted 2008-10-30 09:28 PM

Yo Steavenr,

The idea of the night is there in this write.

Bobby

Bill Charles
Member Patricius

since 2000-07-11

Posts 10619
highways, & byways, for now

3 posted 2008-10-30 09:30 PM

steavenr - got me at the end, never expected it. Very nice Holloween write...

BC

steavenr
Member Elite

since 2003-11-17

Posts 4058

4 posted 2008-10-30 09:40 PM

Janette,
good...I was hoping someone would comment on that line...glad it was you and glad you liked it...thank you for the nice comments

Bobby,
fantastic...nothing like the flavor of Halloween around Halloween...thank you for reading and commenting

Bill,
well then, sir, it did what I wanted it to do...I love to read a piece with a twist at the end...glad you enjoyed...thanks

TRACE2RYM
Junior Member

since 2008-10-09

Posts 38

5 posted 2008-10-30 09:55 PM

When but at halloween can you put screech and banchee in a poem. good job

Marchmadness
Member Rara Avis

since 2007-09-16

Posts 9271
So. El Monte, California

6 posted 2008-11-01 03:22 AM

Fine writing. Love that ending, Steaven.
Ida

Roniece Dawson-Bruce
Member Ascendant

since 2000-01-29

Posts 5689
Sydney, Australia

7 posted 2008-11-01 05:02 AM

wonderful Steaven!! Happy Holloween!
love RDB

Be kind at heart....for everyone you meet has their own battle to fight.........

steavenr
Member Elite

since 2003-11-17

Posts 4058

8 posted 2008-11-01 10:51 AM

TRACE,
ah, yes, the beauty of the occasional word...thanks for reading and taking the time to comment

Ida,
glad you liked the ending...appreciate your kind words

RDB,
thank you...glad you enjoyed it...my fourth Halloween here in the deep South and ne'er one visitor for Halloween candy...maybe I should put my pet pitbull up

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