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Open Poetry #43

time was then

steavenr
Member Elite

since 2003-11-17

Posts 4058

0 posted 2008-09-17 03:10 PM

the time was then when it was now
and now was when it would someday be
as life was fragile yet simple in
its living and its constancy

for thoughts were like the south-warmed wind
that blows its strains so subtly
warming soft the views we've seen
into long-lived thoughts as memory

pressing our minds into molds of heart
while loosing our dreams in reverie
stitching the threads of remembering
while fantasy turns into reality

the time was then when it was now
and now was when it would someday be

Robert E. Jordan
Member Rara Avis

since 2008-01-25

Posts 8541
Philadelphia, Pennsylvania

1 posted 2008-09-17 05:40 PM

Yo Steavenr,

This moves along very rhythmically. I like that about it.

Bobby

Midnitesun

Member Empyrean

since 2001-05-18

Posts 28647
Gaia

2 posted 2008-09-19 07:00 PM

"for thoughts were like the south-warmed wind
that blows its strains so subtly
warming soft the views we've seen
into long-lived thoughts as memory"

I especially like the above line, thought the entire poem is well written, and gently evocative of fond memories.

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