Open Poetry #42 |
Morning Visitors |
MJ Member
since 2008-02-21
Posts 60 |
Vaguely unsettled, I awaken slowly Knowing there was a dark dream It stole away quickly before the dawn Did I thrash or scream? Intermittent flashes of faces I knew As I brush my teeth and dry my hair I glance, but refuse to acknowledge them Why are they still there? Out the door quickly, driving to work In my peripheral vision they appear Tension builds until flesh meets flesh My head snaps back, I taste the fear. I drive as the beating commences My eyes see both present and past Cars on the highway, boots and fists How much longer will it last? My cheek rests on cold pavement now A car door slams, they drive away Images dissolve as I pull in the drive Their visit is over; I begin my day. |
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passing shadows Member Empyrean
since 1999-08-26
Posts 45577displaced |
kinda spooky I think I'd rather just be alone |
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simon Member
since 2008-01-14
Posts 440London, England |
what an interesting piece of writing. Pleased it's not just me! Enjoyed... |
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MJ Member
since 2008-02-21
Posts 60 |
passing shadows....yes, I'd rather be alone too Simon, nope it's not just you |
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Marchmadness Member Rara Avis
since 2007-09-16
Posts 9271So. El Monte, California |
Very interesting MJ. You must be very psychic. Ida |
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MJ Member
since 2008-02-21
Posts 60 |
Thank you Marchmadness....not really psychic, just a good memory (too good sometimes). |
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TomMark Member Elite
since 2007-07-27
Posts 2133LA,CA |
interesting indeed. Read several times and only felt the frustration. Oh, life. |
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Artic Wind Member Rara Avis
since 2007-09-16
Posts 8080Realm of Supernatural |
Chilling Write! ARCTIC WIND |
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Roniece Dawson-Bruce Member Ascendant
since 2000-01-29
Posts 5689Sydney, Australia |
oh my! good work here... love RDB Be kind at heart....for everyone you meet has their own battle to fight......... |
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LeeJ Member Patricius
since 2003-06-19
Posts 13296 |
this held me captive....all the way through!!! Thoroughly enjoyed the ride...the visuals...meaning, and the insight....tremendous..thank you |
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MJ Member
since 2008-02-21
Posts 60 |
TomMark...thank you. Yeah, frustration! ArcticWind...thank you, at least I think. ;-) chilling is apropos to your name! Roniece, thank you for your kind comment. LeeJ...they hold me captive too at times. Decided to write about them, see if their grip may slip. Thank you for the compliments. |
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MJ Member
since 2008-02-21
Posts 60 |
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ivordavies Senior Member
since 2007-01-10
Posts 739Chester, England |
MJ Interesting write. Thanks for you comments on 'Shivering mechanics'. I would love to see you write more on this subject in either prose or poetry. 'I drive as the beating commences My eyes see both present and past' Why the fear? Your feelings are well expressed in your poetry and this leaves enough to the readers imagination to draw their own conclusions. Is this the same in your shop or is a different experience? Look forward to more.... Ivor The moment created this second, is a moment that's going to last. |
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TinaTrivett Senior Member
since 2006-07-15
Posts 569 |
This was great. Loved it. |
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MJ Member
since 2008-02-21
Posts 60 |
Thank you Tina, I am glad you enjoyed it. |
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MJ Member
since 2008-02-21
Posts 60 |
Ivor, thank you for your kind comments. This is not related to my shop, it is one of several experiences from the distant past that I relive at times without much choice. When that happens, the fear that I'm about to be killed seems as real as it was back then. |
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effjayel Senior Member
since 2007-09-30
Posts 1474At the Crossroads of Infinity |
MJ Dragons I once chased creep up from behind, tormenting & teasing & invading my mind..... they have a habit of following you too it seems....enjoyed & welcome on board..... John |
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