Aren't You The Least Bit Afraid?

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Open Poetry #42

Aren't You The Least Bit Afraid?

LynnFromCT
Member

since 2008-02-18

Posts 53
CT, USA

0 posted 2008-02-21 07:08 PM

I'm not locked in a cell but my mind is a mess.
I'm never alone - mythoughts so undressed.
The laughter grows louder; errie music abounds,
It now hurts my head please shut off those sounds.

Just leave..... me alone!!! Why won't you just go?
I don't want you here; your not friend, but foe...
Draining my thoughts - drowning my dreams,
this evil cackle is making me scream.

Just a flip of the switch has turned off the light;
erased all life's color; making everything black and white.
Sinister clouds gather momentum by the hour
they are barely on the surface sucking out all of God's power.

Whisking away happiness; as a swift wind steals your breath,
as the sun beats down it claims one too many deaths.
The heat will sear the earth; killing all in its path..
We have seen this coming so now we deal with his wrath.

He warned us he would be the master of us all.
He gave us what we wanted and then nailed us to the wall.
As long as we lived; we could do as we pleased...
by signing on the dotted line - upon your death your soul he'll seize.

Is the inevitable worth the price you will have paid?
He will torture and torment you... aren't you the least bit afraid?

SEA

Moderator

Member Seraphic

since 2000-01-18

Posts 22676
with you

1 posted 2008-02-21 07:36 PM

nope

I know where I'm going...

the flow of this is really great...very much enjoyed the way this built up, like music in a scary movie!

amusemi
Senior Member

since 2001-12-08

Posts 1262
A State of Disarray

2 posted 2008-02-21 07:53 PM

Me either....if I go South, I'll just take over..hee, hee. No seriously, great write.

Artic Wind
Member Rara Avis

since 2007-09-16

Posts 8080
Realm of Supernatural

3 posted 2008-02-21 09:13 PM

Wonderful Write Indeed...!

ARCTIC WIND

effjayel
Senior Member

since 2007-09-30

Posts 1474
At the Crossroads of Infinity

4 posted 2008-02-22 05:32 AM

Lynn

The subject matter & the way it was delivered was very good, the tempo however, was excellent. It rattled along with a rhythm that reminded me of riding the old railway trains over here, a swaying kind of feel if that makes sense?

Regards

John

Pilgrimage
Member Elite

since 2001-12-04

Posts 3945
Texas, USA

5 posted 2008-02-22 03:36 PM

I like the way this one rattles along, and I really like the use of language to increase the impact.

Nan (Pilgrim variety)

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