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Open Poetry #42
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My Sanctuary
| Open Poetry #42 |
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My Sanctuary |
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Larrysmom Senior Member
since 2008-04-03
Posts 533Florida, USA |
My Sanctuary; My hell I enter your room and leave the evil of the world surrounding me outside. In here, it cannot touch me. It cannot wrap itself around my mind and force me to know it. In here I am safe, secure, at ease. This, my sanctuary. In here I am engulfed in the life of you, from the first moments of you to the young man you became. In here, in my sanctuary, I can see and watch as my mind’s projector plays the scenes one by one past my mind’s eye. In here, I am surrounded by the love that is you; I am immersed in the beauty, both inside and out, that is you. The child that is mine. In here, I am left to submerge myself in the memories of you, my Son. Hence, this is my hell, for as much as I can watch the reel inside my head, I cannot hear the laughter that spills from the magnanimous smile on your beautiful face. I cannot hear the voice that follows. I cannot reach out and touch the flesh of you. I cannot wrap within my arms the vessel that once carried you on this Earthly plane. I cannot, no matter how much I long to, I cannot hear your answers to the words I speak aloud to your spirit. You are beyond all this that I am trapped here in. Still, I find such comfort here in your room, spending time with your memory. After all, you are still, and forever will be my Son. So until I reach the place where you now are, I will come in here and find a moment of peace and solace. Here in my sanctuary; my hell. [This message has been edited by Larrysmom (04-07-2008 03:47 PM).] |
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| © Copyright 2008 Tammy Brown - All Rights Reserved | |||
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A Romantic Heart Member Ascendant
since 1999-09-03
Posts 5496Forever In Your Heart |
Beautiful, heartfelt, and moving... enjoyed it, felt your emotions. ~ARH  You know you're in love, when you can't fall asleep,because reality is finally better than your dream~Dr.Seuss |
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A Romantic Heart Member Ascendant
since 1999-09-03
Posts 5496Forever In Your Heart |
I just viewed the tribute video, and it made me cry, I have two sons of my own, my heart goes out to you, and I am sending hugs, lots of hugs to your heart! ~ARH |
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Larrysmom Senior Member
since 2008-04-03
Posts 533Florida, USA |
ARH, Thank you so much for your kind words and especially for giving of your time to meat Larry… I will take all the hugs I can get. They truly do help. Tammy<333 |
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JamesMichael Member Empyrean
since 1999-11-16
Posts 33336Kapolei, Hawaii, USA |
Thanks for sharing the beautiful memories from your heart for your son Larry...a long and sincere hug...James |
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Marchmadness Member Rara Avis
since 2007-09-16
Posts 9271So. El Monte, California |
This is so beautiful and touching, it left me in tears. Having lost two children myself it really hit home. Hugs to you and Larry Ida |
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Larrysmom Senior Member
since 2008-04-03
Posts 533Florida, USA |
Thank you so much James… As always, thank you for giving of your time to learn of him. And the hug, I will take, I can use all of them that I can get…  Tammy<333 |
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Larrysmom Senior Member
since 2008-04-03
Posts 533Florida, USA |
Dear Ida, I am so very sorry for the loss of your two children… I am sorry it brought tears to you and at the same time I understand why. Thank you so much for reading it. I will take your hug for me and Larry… Tammy<333 |
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Artic Wind Member Rara Avis
since 2007-09-16
Posts 8080Realm of Supernatural |
I see we have never met, Welcome to pip ARCTIC WIND |
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Larrysmom Senior Member
since 2008-04-03
Posts 533Florida, USA |
Thank you for the welcome Arctic Wind… Beautiful choice of name. Tammy<333 |
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Margherita Member Seraphic
since 2003-02-08
Posts 22236Eternity |
quote: May this feeling of comfort predominate, so that you can go about your days with increased energy and love. In this sanctuary you can still exchange the breath of life you shared here on Earth. Tammy, this is extremely touching and I want to reach out again with a big tender hug. Love, Margherita  |
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Larrysmom Senior Member
since 2008-04-03
Posts 533Florida, USA |
Thank you so very much Margherita… I will take your hug and the comfort of it… Tammy<333 |
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Martie
Moderator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-09-21
Posts 28049California |
Dear Tammy.....I think you probably know, that I still have a box of things. It has been a very long time since I needed to rub her blue blanket or look at the words, I love you, Mom. Her dresses have been gone for years and her room made into the place in the house of comfort...the place called, a den. I sit in that room every night without a thought of her, yet in the pleasure of the room, she exists...not in the space, but in my heart. You remind me of how important, things that were material parts of her were, such a long long time ago. I wish you didn't have this pain that I understand too well.  |
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Seoulair Senior Member
since 2008-03-27
Posts 807Seoul S.Korea |
Our feelings get hurt in memories while our heart get comforted by memories. I love this poem. |
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Larrysmom Senior Member
since 2008-04-03
Posts 533Florida, USA |
Martie, Thank you for your wish. I have always told my boys that for as long as I live, my home will be theirs, and they will always have a room of their own within it… Larry’s room will always be Larry’s room, no matter how many years pass or how many houses become home…same for Darrin (Larry’s little brother). I agree with you that Larry does not exist in his room, nor does he exist in his things, however, his room, filled with his things, each one a product of a memory made. When I look at any given thing, it sparks the memory of how and when it came about. There is more to the story of Larry’s room, but I think I have taken up enough of the board this time around, so it will have to wait. Seoulair, Yes my friend, beautifully expressed… Thank you so much. I am so happy you loved it. Tammy<333 |
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Roniece Dawson-Bruce Member Ascendant
since 2000-01-29
Posts 5689Sydney, Australia |
Tammy... I'm holding you in my thoughts - such beautiful writing for your beautiful son.. .love RDB Be kind at heart....for everyone you meet has their own battle to fight......... |
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Larrysmom Senior Member
since 2008-04-03
Posts 533Florida, USA |
RDB, Thank you so much for your kind words… I am so happy you found it to be beautiful. Tammy<333 |
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Susan Caldwell Member Rara Avis
since 2002-12-27
Posts 8348Florida |
This cuts deeply, and I bleed for you. "too bad ignorance isn't painful" |
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Larrysmom Senior Member
since 2008-04-03
Posts 533Florida, USA |
Thank you so much Susan... Tammy<333 |
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effjayel Senior Member
since 2007-09-30
Posts 1474At the Crossroads of Infinity |
Tammy, I am unable to find the words to say what I feel, it is too hard for me, Good Job, John |
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Paul Wilson
since 2002-07-07
Posts 4711United States |
Tammy...Touching heartfelt write. I really could feel the pain within your words and the memories that will never die...Paul ~~To share my poems with you is to share my heart with you~~ |
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Larrysmom Senior Member
since 2008-04-03
Posts 533Florida, USA |
John, What you have written says what you are feeling. Thank you so very much… I don’t know how to make those little huggers pop up in here, so I will have to send you a smile instead. Tammy<333 Paul, Thank you so much for your kind words. They mean more than you could know… Tammy<333 |
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Alison
since 2008-01-27
Posts 9318Lumpy oatmeal makes me crazy! |
Tammy<333 You share so much of Larry and yourself with us. You are a gift - and a teacher. I think you are teaching me with every poem that I read. I am sending you hugs - and my thoughts are with you. Alison |
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Larrysmom Senior Member
since 2008-04-03
Posts 533Florida, USA |
Alison, you are truly bringing me to tears… Thank you my dear friend… I could not ask for anything more of my writing… Tammy<333 |
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sewasham Senior Member
since 2006-09-11
Posts 714Oklahoma, USA |
Very touching. I can't imagine the pain you must feel at the loss of a child. My heart goes out to you. Take care. Steve |
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Larrysmom Senior Member
since 2008-04-03
Posts 533Florida, USA |
Thank you so much Steve… Tammy<333 |
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K-K Member
since 2008-03-13
Posts 153Indiana |
Thinking of you and hoping dearly you made it through yesterday. I too will come to a 1 year mark from the loss of a 5 year old, Cory on July 28. Every day is hard, but it is the BIG days and holidays that hurt the most. Stay strong |
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Marge Tindal
since 1999-11-06
Posts 42384Florida's Foreverly Shores |
Tammy~ I feel this~ My youngest brother was killed in a vehicle accident, due to the negligence of a drunken driver~ My mother never got over the loss of her son~ As a sister who felt the loss so deeply, I know that I've never gotten over the missing~ I wish you comfort as you wend your way through the grieving processs~ *Huglets* ~*Marge*~ ~*The sound of a kiss is not as strong as that of a cannon, but it's echo endures much longer*~ |
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1slick_lady Member Ascendant
since 2000-12-22
Posts 6088standing on a shadow's lace |
very tender tough and touching i am so very sorry for your loss |
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Larrysmom Senior Member
since 2008-04-03
Posts 533Florida, USA |
Thank you so very much Steve... Tammy<333 |
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peppermint35 Senior Member
since 2000-05-28
Posts 1106Texas, USA |
No, there truly is no way to imagine the pain of losing a child; but with your writing you are expressing both the pain and the joy; the truth is that you can smile through your tears as each memory goes through your mind, your heart, your soul day in and day out. This is simply and truly written. I do understand, truly; after 4 years, the pain is still as fresh to me as the day my daughter died, but time has brought some peace into my heart and I pray it will in yours. Keep on writing, it really does help. Pepper |
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hiddensmiles Senior Member
since 2008-02-07
Posts 514at the beach... i wish |
great poem i will be praying for you !!!!!!!!! this is a library JJ |
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Larrysmom Senior Member
since 2008-04-03
Posts 533Florida, USA |
K-K, Thank you my dear friend. I cannot wait to meet your beautiful Cory… You will get through his one-year mark. Larry’s one-year mark was not filled with sorrow and despair for me because although we did remember his death, we used it to celebrate his life and the love he so unselfishly gave… You will find what helps you through it, I promise. Marge, I am so sorry for the loss of your brother. Your words mean the world to me. More than you could know. To say that you “felt” my words… well, what more could I possibly ask for. Thank you so very much. 1slick_lady, I noticed you used the word “tough” to describe my piece… Thank you. Larry would be happy to know that. Thank you so very much… Pepper, Thank you so very much… I have to keep writing. I cannot hold it all in… Hiddensmiles, Thank you again, so very much… Tammy<333 |
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