navwin » Archives » Open Poetry #41 » Bondage (Tarot Challenge)
Open Poetry #41
Post A Reply Post New Topic Bondage (Tarot Challenge) Go to Previous / Newer Topic Back to Topic List Go to Next / Older Topic
Susan Caldwell
Member Rara Avis
since 2002-12-27
Posts 8348
Florida

0 posted 2007-12-04 01:38 PM



I am the balance
You fail to maintain
Self doubt, your comfort

Standing, judging
Not of here
Not of there
Somewhere in between
Uncertainty stifles

Will your soul
Be sacrificed
Passed to the beast
Of your excuses?

You dare
Judge others
Willing yourself
To believe
You are the virtuous one

Last card turned
XV slides atop
Temperance lost

"too bad ignorance isn't painful"
~Unknown~

© Copyright 2007 Susan Caldwell - All Rights Reserved
serenity blaze
Member Empyrean
since 2000-02-02
Posts 27738

1 posted 2007-12-04 02:21 PM


This is soooooooooooo psychologically astute.

Deceptively simple

Now let me see if I get this right, because like I said, it's deceptive.

"I am the balance
You fail to maintain
Self doubt, your comfort"

People get all hung up on accuracy and truth in poetry and in life; poetry ain't reporting and life experience is subject to the colors of our own perceptions. So...

"I am the balance
You fail to maintain"

What is most important is the speaker feels objectified, even if the object in question is a not a tangible noun. It renders one a tool, and that's always a bad way to start. (The complexity comes in with the questions you seek answers for in philosophy, which is doesn't everyone expect something from everyone else?)

"Self doubt, your comfort"

I'm nodding again. Many of us (read huge blinking light over ME)have defined ourselves to stagnation, embracing even the things which are unfavorable. (I'm at the behavior modification part. With a prescription for chantix! *laughing and winking*) But some think that self-confidence means self-acceptance and shrug off their foibles as "just who I am."

Beware of them folk. They are not only gonna not TRY--they will expect you to be the "ever nurtuering, understanding 'mother'".

I won't go line by line, 'cause I don't have the time, but I felt your second stanza was a natural evolution of your opener:

"Standing, judging
Not of here
Not of there
Somewhere in between
Uncertainty stifles"

We want resolution, don't we? And when that seems to be impossible, when all avenues of potential are blocked, both parties...withdraw, and this can become--habit. *thwack me on the head thrice 'cause I knew better*

"Will your soul
Be sacrificed
Passed to the beast
Of your excuses?"

This is the plaintive painful plea, and it hurts too--and the difference between reasons and excuses is point of view. But I think I 'get' this--tired of words that mean nothing. It's "show me or "b'low me" time."

"You dare
Judge others
Willing yourself
To believe
You are the virtuous one"

Now this one is tricky too, because, paradoxically, deeming someone judgemental is a judgement.

"Last card turned up"

I might have left it at "last call" just to play on the word on the word temperance and suggest indulgence, but that's just me.

The reveal of the next card as you imply suggests that this the subject is cyclic, yet predictable.

Thanks for playing.

Thanks for understanding that there ain't no wrong answer.

And thanks for taking the challenge and keeping it uniquely you.

Love you lady!

You are growing so fast you will soon be Amazon.


Susan Caldwell
Member Rara Avis
since 2002-12-27
Posts 8348
Florida
2 posted 2007-12-04 02:28 PM


ohhhhhhh...."last call" does fit so much better..

I'd be all modest here, but oh hell, I even liked this one.  

and I loved putting the time into it.  

love you too!

"too bad ignorance isn't painful"
~Unknown~

Sunshine
Administrator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-06-25
Posts 63354
Listening to every heart
3 posted 2007-12-04 02:42 PM


quote:
I'd be all modest here, but oh hell, I even liked this one.


Glow, girl.

I'll be back to take it all in...including the challenge!

  

iliana
Member Patricius
since 2003-12-05
Posts 13434
USA
4 posted 2007-12-05 12:33 PM


Susan -- between Ser and you, I seem to be learning a little tarot.  Yours really made me think deeply and see different angles.  This tarot challenge is really interesting, isn't it?!   .......jo
Earth Angel
Member Empyrean
since 2002-08-27
Posts 40215
Realms of Light
5 posted 2007-12-05 01:04 PM


Susan, I am intrigued by your approach to Temperance. A fascinating study, indeed. Your searching and philosophical mind is a beautiful thing to behold! You see things that others may not. You delve deeply and with much thought. I appreciate both yours and iliana's interpretations of the Archangel Michael card.

I also enjoyed reading the Serene One's in-depth responses to both of your poetic offerings.

Love and moderation in all things! ~ Well, perhaps not in ALL things! lol


Linda


icebox
Member Elite
since 2003-05-03
Posts 4383
in the shadows
6 posted 2007-12-05 03:30 PM


This is great!

Serenity's anaysis pretty much says it all, so I'll just agree.

On a side note, many years ago I had a young friend who was really into bondage; she was a lot of fun when we could arrange our schedules to see each other, but most of the time, whenever I was free she was all tied up.  I guess it just wasn't in the cards.




Susan Caldwell
Member Rara Avis
since 2002-12-27
Posts 8348
Florida
7 posted 2007-12-06 09:20 AM


Thank you for the kind responses.  

and Icy? I totally believe your story...

"too bad ignorance isn't painful"
~Unknown~

Post A Reply Post New Topic ⇧ top of page ⇧ Go to Previous / Newer Topic Back to Topic List Go to Next / Older Topic
All times are ET (US). All dates are in Year-Month-Day format.
navwin » Archives » Open Poetry #41 » Bondage (Tarot Challenge)

Passions in Poetry | pipTalk Home Page | Main Poetry Forums | 100 Best Poems

How to Join | Member's Area / Help | Private Library | Search | Contact Us | Login
Discussion | Tech Talk | Archives | Sanctuary