Open Poetry #41 |
No importa |
Susan Caldwell Member Rara Avis
since 2002-12-27
Posts 8348Florida |
dressed in indifference. dredged in disregard. no longer. no longer chilled easily. (laughter is empty. hollow love. selfishness teaches gazer (witness). tired eyes and heart hard with disregard). blood still touches. without it there would be nothing. black, empty hands. devils work. (tears drown the inside. leaching into internal wounds. salt pain. it will not stop. forever). desensitized. to what is wanted. desensitized to lack. blind. blinded. blindfolded. a choice made. “I didn’t know you needed to know.” (outside. witness of nothing and everything). ________________________________________________ About the grammar~ yes, it is done purposely. "too bad ignorance isn't painful" |
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© Copyright 2007 Susan Caldwell - All Rights Reserved | |||
inkedgoddess Member Rara Avis
since 2002-11-19
Posts 7392Ohio |
i feel the tomb of the calloused heart here well done and effective as always to this reader |
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Earth Angel Member Empyrean
since 2002-08-27
Posts 40215Realms of Light |
"(tears drown the inside. leaching into internal wounds. salt pain. it will not stop. forever)" ~ There may come chapters in one's 'life book' when the salt stings our wounds deeply ~ more deeply than words can express, (mind you, you have done one helluvva fine job of it here!), however, I have found that, in time, those chapters are closed and so are the doors to the pain. May all your future chapters be filled with joy! Loving, comforting, healing hug, Linda |
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secondhanddreampoet Member Ascendant
since 2006-11-07
Posts 6394a 'Universalist' ! |
A VERY powerful, emotive 'write!' [which I believe I can (unfortunately) most strongly 'relate' to...as witnessed by my 'autobiographical' "November Reckoning" post recently] v. serious, sustained applause for this penning! |
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oceanvu2 Senior Member
since 2007-02-24
Posts 1066Santa Monica, California, USA |
Pretty darned sophisticated! The sense of it, for me comes from the way "dressed in indifference" and "a choice made" tie it together. The inside and outside is clear, and "I didn't know you needed to know." made me sit up straight. Certainly been there. Been told that and have said that. It should resonate/reverb all over the place. Strong work. BTW: love your tag line! Larry the Cable Guy's take on it goes: "You cain't catch stupid. You got to be born with it." Best, Jim |
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ladylisa Member
since 2007-04-29
Posts 342Florida USA |
I could really relate to this piece for I have been there and stayed way too long. Writing pieces like this helped me shut that chapter and move on and heal. Nice to see others who understand that place. lisa |
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Midnitesun
since 2001-05-18
Posts 28647Gaia |
"(tears drown the inside. leaching into internal wounds. salt pain" It is sad that so many can relate to this. Namaste, and warm heart hugs. |
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Susan Caldwell Member Rara Avis
since 2002-12-27
Posts 8348Florida |
Thank you. I am humbled by the responses. Again, it was done so close to the skin I wear that I didn't think anyone would understand... But I was shown that so many do. Thank you. "too bad ignorance isn't painful" |
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serenity blaze Member Empyrean
since 2000-02-02
Posts 27738 |
and I? "didn't know you needed to know." Forgive me sweet lady. gobble gobbled this |
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Sunshine
Administrator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-06-25
Posts 63354Listening to every heart |
Oceanvu did right by promoting this piece, sweetie... quote: It's when you write that close... that we all applaud you! I thought that was how you always did it... |
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Susan Caldwell Member Rara Avis
since 2002-12-27
Posts 8348Florida |
"didn't know you needed to know." ~~ see I thought that really meant, "stay away" so it left a bit of a scrap..and I sucked it up...well, at least until I wrote this.. Karen, you have no real idea of how much you and your responses mean to me. Really. "too bad ignorance isn't painful" |
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Susan Caldwell Member Rara Avis
since 2002-12-27
Posts 8348Florida |
*smile* that was very nice of Jim. and thank you Karilea. (and for the record, sometimes I just totally make things up) *eg* "too bad ignorance isn't painful" |
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1slick_lady Member Ascendant
since 2000-12-22
Posts 6088standing on a shadow's lace |
"blind. blinded. blindfolded. a choice made." you have just written of most of us |
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aziza Member Elite
since 2006-07-09
Posts 2995Lumpy Oatmeal makes me Crazy! |
You know, Susan, sometimes I read poetry and I don't know what to say. It's hard to put words to the feelings that poetry can evoke. It is for me anyway. This is a poem that does that to me. dressed in indifference. dredged in disregard. no longer. no longer chilled easily. You captured me and I have no words to express my thoughts. But, I do feel them and I do feel your poem. Alison |
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Susan Caldwell Member Rara Avis
since 2002-12-27
Posts 8348Florida |
Thank you Helen and Alison. "too bad ignorance isn't painful" |
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Roniece Dawson-Bruce Member Ascendant
since 2000-01-29
Posts 5689Sydney, Australia |
Susan..... wonderfully expressed.. I do so enjoy your work... thank you for sharing and yes, I do hear you ... RDB Be kind at heart....for everyone you meet has their own battle to fight......... |
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icebox Member Elite
since 2003-05-03
Posts 4383in the shadows |
You make me proud to know you. This is excellent writing. ...and this: "blood still touches. without it there would be nothing. black, empty hands. devils work. (tears drown the inside. leaching into internal wounds. salt pain. it will not stop. forever)." ...simply stunned me. That felt like it floated up from the dark dreams of an old merc. |
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Artic Wind Member Rara Avis
since 2007-09-16
Posts 8080Realm of Supernatural |
Nicely put ARCTIC WIND |
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Susan Caldwell Member Rara Avis
since 2002-12-27
Posts 8348Florida |
Thank you Icy. Your opinion means a great deal to me. Thank you Artic. "too bad ignorance isn't painful" |
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oceanvu2 Senior Member
since 2007-02-24
Posts 1066Santa Monica, California, USA |
I keep coming back to this, and it just gets better. Made it the first poem in my "library" Best, Jim |
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Susan Caldwell Member Rara Avis
since 2002-12-27
Posts 8348Florida |
you have incredible timing. Thank you for that. "too bad ignorance isn't painful" |
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Margherita Member Seraphic
since 2003-02-08
Posts 22236Eternity |
"No importa" how often we use to say this, in the very moment when pain is inflicted, we say "no importa", but do we know the inside storms!! You wrote a memorable piece here, dear Susan. Thank you. Love, Margherita |
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hoot_owl_rn Member Patricius
since 1999-07-05
Posts 10750Glen Hope, PA USA |
been here done this How could you think for a minute that we might not understand? We've all thin skin when it comes to matters of the heart Ruth |
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Susan Caldwell Member Rara Avis
since 2002-12-27
Posts 8348Florida |
Thank you Ruth. "too bad ignorance isn't painful" |
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vlraynes Member Rara Avis
since 2000-07-25
Posts 8229Somewhere... out there... |
"blood still touches. without it there would be nothing. black, empty hands. devils work. (tears drown the inside. leaching into internal wounds. salt pain. it will not stop. forever)." powerful and heart-wrenching write, Susan... "When the power of love overcomes the love |
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Mysteria
since 2001-03-07
Posts 18328British Columbia, Canada |
This brought back a few of my own leaches to be honest and Susan, |
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