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Open Poetry #41

mosey town mass

Dark Stranger
Member Patricius

since 2001-03-19

Posts 13631
West Coast

0 posted 2007-10-01 06:33 AM

perhaps my timing for repentance
was a bit hurried
or maybe it was my attention
to the fatherly conditions

but you did bring your eve skin
before the willing altar
and you dressed for the occasion
with special consideration

that everyone might sin again
after they knew you with their eyes
and that seemed to bring you a smile
more often than love would

so I listened to your confession
as you leaned over my mind
permitting me the redemption
of your most perfect temptations

your lovely weapons of mass destruction
___________
daark

EConover
Junior Member

since 2007-10-01

Posts 14

1 posted 2007-10-01 07:04 AM

I miss that woman.

"that everyone might sin again
after they knew you with their eyes
and that seemed to bring you a smile
more often than love would"

I've been with this woman before, and your poem brought me back into her bed. Thank you for that. E

PoppaLoco
Member

since 2007-09-23

Posts 83
EU, NL, Limburg

2 posted 2007-10-01 10:03 AM

I know this feeling, I'm sure many of us do, and I've never been able to pinpoint it quite as accurately till you penned it down. Thank you!
Pops

Gentle Spirit
Member Patricius

since 2000-10-09

Posts 13989

3 posted 2007-10-01 02:05 PM

You do such amazing things with your words D.

Enjoyed it babe.

The Lady
Member Rara Avis

since 2005-12-26

Posts 7634
The Southwest

4 posted 2007-10-08 08:10 PM

stranger darlin'
you do grant forgivness
in the most delightful way

jwesley
Member Rara Avis

since 2000-04-30

Posts 7563
Spring, Texas

5 posted 2007-10-08 08:12 PM

Terrific write, my friend. Your words ring solid and true, yet beautiful.

jwesley

Dark Stranger
Member Patricius

since 2001-03-19

Posts 13631
West Coast

6 posted 2007-10-08 11:13 PM

pipcrew..thanks to each of you for the eyes here

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