Open Poetry #40 |
My pen becomes my heart's obey |
Rick Member Elite
since 2001-06-21
Posts 2903Victoria, Australia |
My pen becomes my heart’s obey As more I write of love each day The coming and the passed away The suffering and need I hear the heartbreaks and the tears The questions asked of coming years The feelings felt and inner fears I hold the hands which bleed And wipe away the hurt and pain Tend the wounds that still remain Wipe the tears that leave their stain And grievance of their deed Consoling soul and keeping warm Holding tight until the dawn Being there till hope is born And truce has been decreed Then again heart’s words become My pens reward for what I’ve done And through the clouds I spot the sun And sow a better seed My pen becomes my heart's obey Of comings and of passed away |
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© Copyright 2007 Rick Van Weenen - All Rights Reserved | |||
JamesMichael Member Empyrean
since 1999-11-16
Posts 33336Kapolei, Hawaii, USA |
Nice writing...James |
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Larry C
since 2001-09-10
Posts 10286United States |
Rick, I did indeed enjoy this write. I think it is well done. I do believe I have been there too. If tears could build a stairway and memories a lane, |
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Rick Member Elite
since 2001-06-21
Posts 2903Victoria, Australia |
Hi James, great to have you visit here, thank you for your reply, much appreciated. Hi Larry, I think at times we are all there my friend, thank you for your comments, enjoyed. Rick |
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Robert Jordan Member
since 2007-02-07
Posts 392Philadelphia Pa USA |
Rick, I always like the end lines of your strophes. You've got a knack. Bobby |
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Drauntz Member Elite
since 2007-03-16
Posts 2905Los Angeles California |
beautiful and beautiful truly. enjoyed. |
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hoot_owl_rn Member Patricius
since 1999-07-05
Posts 10750Glen Hope, PA USA |
Beautiful words in a form I've tried my hand at a few times and greatly enjoy. My only real critque is that the end rhyme in the first 3 lines of stanza 4 is a bit off from the perfect rhyme in the remainder of the piece...but a lovely write none the less Ruth |
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Rick Member Elite
since 2001-06-21
Posts 2903Victoria, Australia |
Hi Robert, good to see you here again, thank you for your nice reply here my friend, much appreciated once again. Drauntz, wonderful to see you here again, thanks for taking time to read and reply. Hi Ruth, thank you so much for your reply and comments, I know what you mean, really did not realize at the time, but really if I had of, probably would not have changed it though, brought across what was meant. Great to have you visit, have a wonderful day. To you all my friends, thank you so much for your time and replies, each was well enjoyed and heat felt. Rick |
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MGROVES
since 2004-02-01
Posts 3802california |
enjoyed~ been enjoying all of your work My spirit will rise |
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Rick Member Elite
since 2001-06-21
Posts 2903Victoria, Australia |
Hi MGROVES, thank you my friend, I have been enjoying all of your replies as well, great to have you visit and be there, have a great day and take care. Rick |
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Nightingale Junior Member
since 2007-06-21
Posts 31Depths of The Unkown, UK |
A true poet at heart! |
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Rick Member Elite
since 2001-06-21
Posts 2903Victoria, Australia |
Nightingale, nice to have you visit and reply to my post friend, thank you for your lovely comment, much appreciated and heart felt. Rick |
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ladylisa Member
since 2007-04-29
Posts 342Florida USA |
The pen we hold flows the ebb and tides of our lives in a magical way. Really liked this poem and look forward to reading other works you have. |
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Rick Member Elite
since 2001-06-21
Posts 2903Victoria, Australia |
ladylisa, wonderful to have you visit me today and post your reply, I look forward to sharing many works over time and would be most happy if you take the time out to read; appreciated. Have a great day. Rick |
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