Once - pipTalk Forums

How to Join	Member's Area	Private Library	Search	Sanctuary		Login
Main Forums	Discussion	Tech Talk	Mature Content	Archives	A home without a wall, Our haven without ends, A circle we all call Our Family of Friends!

Open Poetry #40

Once

MoonShadow
Senior Member

since 2001-08-02

Posts 943
Dark side of the Moon.

0 posted 2007-06-18 09:09 AM

           “Once”

Once there was Starshine;
    Curtains of night
Once there were Moonbeams;
    Fingers of light
Once there were breezes,
    that gently caress
Once there was love,
    filled with tenderness
Now there is darkness
    surrounding… over me.

Now there is nothing;
    It all went away
Gone is the Sunshine
   that brightened the day
Gone are the dreams of
    a lifetime never made
Gone are the colors,
    bleached out to a fade
Now there is hopeless
    abounding… over me.

.

passing shadows
Member Empyrean

since 1999-08-26

Posts 45577
displaced

1 posted 2007-06-18 11:21 AM

awww...com'ere

Robert Jordan
Member

since 2007-02-07

Posts 392
Philadelphia Pa USA

2 posted 2007-06-18 01:19 PM

MoonShadow,

Not too bad. Don't capitalize starshine and moonbeams.

Bobby

MoonShadow
Senior Member

since 2001-08-02

Posts 943
Dark side of the Moon.

3 posted 2007-06-18 01:36 PM

Bobby they are capitalized intentionally... and will remain so... for they are allegoriacally "persons" as well. Thank you for your kind response.

JamesMichael
Member Empyrean

since 1999-11-16

Posts 33336
Kapolei, Hawaii, USA

4 posted 2007-06-18 02:47 PM

Nice writing...James

MoonShadow
Senior Member

since 2001-08-02

Posts 943
Dark side of the Moon.

5 posted 2007-06-19 07:04 AM

    Thank you for your kind replies.

            Goodbye.

         MoonShadow
.

The Lady
Member Rara Avis

since 2005-12-26

Posts 7634
The Southwest

6 posted 2007-06-20 09:40 PM

Gentle Sir Moonshadow
your sadness speaks volumes

Starshine and Moonbeams never leave
they only change form

	⇧ top of page ⇧
All times are ET (US). All dates are in Year-Month-Day format.