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Open Poetry #40
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Toerag
Member Ascendant
since 1999-07-29
Posts 5622
Ala bam a

0 posted 2007-05-26 02:14 PM


Balladeer and Toerag
Two poets you'll find here
(I use that term quite loosely
Cuz my poetry's quite weird).

It's like apples and oranges,
Both are types of fruit,
But we're not alike at all
Like dress shoes-cowboy boots.

Deer's like an opera singer
Toe a lowly rocker,
'Deer' like 'Plac' Domingo
I would be Joe Cocker.

Balladeer is "spit and polish"
I'm just mostly "spit"
Deer writes with class-all prim and proper
I just shoot the "poop"

He's a sack of diamonds,
I'm shattered window pane
He's laid back, calm and focused
I'm just plain insane.

I write my "stuff" in minutes
(And you know it shows)
Deer will think and take his time
With eloquence and flow.

He's a clean-cut business man
With Chinese tailored suits,
I'm t-shirts and Levi Jeans
With motorcycle boots.

His taste in women differs too
Though his lady is quite fine,
She thinks he's 'toned' and very handsome,
(Too bad the poor gal's blind).

But I have many lady friends
With looks and high I.Q.
I have a penis AND a brain
Of us there's very few.

He has a book of poetry
It's on sale at Books-R-Us
You can find it in the "Classics"
Next to Curious George's Bus

I've got a book like Balladeer
It's usually in the back
It's titled "Equate Poetry"
And on the magazine rack.


© Copyright 2007 Toerag - All Rights Reserved
Drauntz
Member Elite
since 2007-03-16
Posts 2905
Los Angeles California
1 posted 2007-05-26 05:48 PM


always enjoy your poems of laughter. waiting for Deer to fight back. what a show...good fun.


Sunshine
Administrator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-06-25
Posts 63354
Listening to every heart
2 posted 2007-05-26 09:24 PM


You might all poke fun at one another...
but it's always done with respect!...

of a sort...

which usually provides a giggle
and snort!


Denise
Moderator
Member Seraphic
since 1999-08-22
Posts 22648

3 posted 2007-05-27 10:32 AM


  You never disappoint, Toe! Entertaining as always!
Earth Angel
Member Empyrean
since 2002-08-27
Posts 40215
Realms of Light
4 posted 2007-05-27 12:51 PM


Gosh, would it be possible to wrap you two guys up into one man! I kinda dig BOTH your types. Besides, if Ball-a-deer doesn't have that male appendage, you could provide what he's lacking in that department! One is all that is needed, anyway!

Lindy Lou

ivordavies
Senior Member
since 2007-01-10
Posts 739
Chester, England
5 posted 2007-05-27 06:46 PM


I think that I have never met
a pair of fruits so ripe, and yet
their flavour's both are quite distinct
and always penned in finest ink.

Oranges, Apples, Toes and Deers
all bring music to my ears.
At last I've found upon this site
a sign of life, a litery fight!

So second's out, the moments come
at last I feel we'll have some fun.
I feel a thread could soon appear
when folks take sides with Toe or Deer....

JamesMichael
Member Empyrean
since 1999-11-16
Posts 33336
Kapolei, Hawaii, USA
6 posted 2007-05-28 08:04 AM


Nice...Similar to the odd couple...James
Jaime Fradera
Senior Member
since 2000-11-25
Posts 843
Where no tyranny is tolerable
7 posted 2007-05-28 11:26 AM



Answer this in ten seconds.
Mary and billy went to the store.
Mary bought three apples
and Billy bought five oranges.
Then Mary cut
each of her three apples in half,
and Billy
cut each of his five oranges in half.
Then Mary gave Billy
half of her apple halves
and Billy gave Mary half of his orange halves.
How many apple halves and orange halves
do Mary and Billy halve?

... Then Mary threw Billy
the rest of her apples,
and Billy then threw her
the rest of his oranges,
then Mary and Billy,
and oranges and apples,
all four of them started to rot.


Balladeer
Administrator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-06-05
Posts 25505
Ft. Lauderdale, Fl USA
8 posted 2007-05-29 04:52 PM


Linda, Toe could easily provide the male appendage because he IS the male appendage!

A penis and a brain, Toe? I[m sure you do. Unfortunately they both occupy the same space.

I can understand your bitterness and defensiveness, Toe. It can't be easily living in the shadow of such a great man for so many years. But there is plenty of need for both of us. Some people like Dom Perignon and some like Don DeLouise. Some people like Shakespeare and some just like to shake spears. Some like caviar and champagne and some like beer nuts a a cold Schlitz. We're inseperable, Toe, the flip side of the same coin where I'm the head and you're the tail.

May it always remain so, my pal

Toerag
Member Ascendant
since 1999-07-29
Posts 5622
Ala bam a
9 posted 2007-05-29 05:31 PM


Speaking of "tails" and penis's and brains, did you ever get that big zit taken care of on your butt cheek?.....
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