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Open Poetry #40
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Corner Of My Mind
| Open Poetry #40 |
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Corner Of My Mind |
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trutodaraiders Senior Member
since 2006-12-02
Posts 820CA 
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In secret shadows hidden from view, are feelings kept from friends I knew, lost in the mire of those I have met, Is love and caring, and some regret. "Too late," you say to redeem your soul, to live and love with just one goal, to rights the wrongs of a lifetime's pain, to feel the sun, yet, miss the rain. Looking back on life of those I've hurt, the talks I've missed by being curt, by friends unknown now strangers gone, the moment lost they all moved on. In a far distant corner of my mind, Are those many regrets that I did find, Of loving less, and choosing wrong, For caring not, and hating long. Then clarity beckons to a bright light, blindness escapes then free our sight, The complex world of beauty shines in, Then vanquished we blind let tolerance begin. Reflecting back on the roads divided, My choices made, life's flame ignited, 'Twas apart of living, dying,just growing old, Then God ends your story,and another is told. Poetry is just the evidence of life. If your life is burning well, poetry is just the ash. " Leon Cohen~ |
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| © Copyright 2007 Bill Franklin - All Rights Reserved | |||
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Roniece Dawson-Bruce Member Ascendant
since 2000-01-29
Posts 5689Sydney, Australia |
In a far distant corner of my mind, Are those many regrets that I did find, Of loving less, and choosing wrong, For caring not, and hating long. we all live with regrets my sweet Bill... hate is such a strong word... I liked this piece of yours ... RDB |
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passing shadows Member Empyrean
since 1999-08-26
Posts 45577displaced |
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Jes Member
since 2003-10-21
Posts 422Denmark |
Hi I like your poem because of two things. First because you always look back on your life, you know that somethings shouldnt have be done, but though you know that is what makes you - you. We all have hidden things in our closet, some we will never forget and some we can live with, but in the same sentence we do tell, we wouldnt be our selve, if we hadnt experienced what we have experienced. Second i can see myself in exactly the same words. Smile and best wishes Jes / Dreamer |
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The Lady Member Rara Avis
since 2005-12-26
Posts 7634The Southwest |
"Then vanquished we blind let tolerance begin." beautifully introspective Bill! |
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Paul Wilson
since 2002-07-07
Posts 4711United States |
trutodaraiders...Really enjoyed this. Thanks for sharing. Keep up the good writing...Paul ~~To share my poems with you is to share my heart with you~~ |
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ivordavies Senior Member
since 2007-01-10
Posts 739Chester, England |
Good philosophical, reflective poetry. I enjoyed sharing this although I think I got lost in a language difference (CA/UK) in the penultimate stanza. Was 'apart' meant to be 'a part' in the final stanza? But, altogether another excellent piece of poetry that lets you share your lifetime's journey, through regrets, to awakening. Have Fun, Ivor The moment created this second, is a moment that's going to last. |
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trutodaraiders Senior Member
since 2006-12-02
Posts 820CA |
Ivor thank you for your kind review. Instead of using seperate as a Transitive Verb i used apart as a Adverb- To disunite, keep apart. Thank you for your thoughts. I am glad you enjoyed this poem. Your comments are always valued, and welcome |
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ivordavies Senior Member
since 2007-01-10
Posts 739Chester, England |
Yes I see that now, completely reverses the meaning, clever use of English and I missed the emphasis on mind being separate to the physical. Goes to show how difficult comprehension can be sometimes! Thanks for getting back to me, Ivor The moment created this second, is a moment that's going to last. |
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