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navwin » Archives » Teen Poetry #8 » another untitled one
Teen Poetry #8
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surf_painter
Member
since 2007-04-10
Posts 434
Canada
0 posted 2007-05-13 11:18 PM

I shudder
You fall
The wind whispers
Words lost
Time Ticks
People stand
Gone forever
The love floats
While we sink
Dry land gloats
Are you there
The lights gone out
Fear snickers
Life stops
Hands stretched
You reach
Flooding in
It was just
Water heaves
I shudder
You fall
I awake
© Copyright 2007 surf_painter - All Rights Reserved
pen&paper
Senior Member
since 2006-06-06
Posts 513
1 posted 2007-05-26 08:18 AM

Wow..I...don't quite know what to say...

This was amazing. I absolutely loved it. The rhythym and the suspense were phenomenal. Very well written. Great write!!!!!!!

Pen
surf_painter
Member
since 2007-04-10
Posts 434
Canada
2 posted 2007-05-26 12:10 PM

thank you very much
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navwin » Archives » Teen Poetry #8 » another untitled one

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