Teen Poetry #8 |
It's time |
freeand2sexy Senior Member
since 2008-09-12
Posts 704CA, USA |
So here's another horrible poem that I just wrote, It needs some work, I think, so please help me if you can. I need critiques of any kind. It's time To pick up all my things, and throw them away It's time To wake up from my sleep, and search for another way I've walked out the door empty handed Couldn't take it anymore, I've had it Don't want nothing of this place Living in a world I once faced It's time To let go of those I loved, and will always love It's time To walk away from this life, though it maybe tough A world of self-centered desires A life of following the liars Leading into their eternal death Tasting the lies in their breath It's time To open up my eyes, and see for the first time It's time To hurry up and leave, escaping from the theives I'll leave to another place, a better home Bringing nothing they have, but my own My empty heart, empty life, empty hands Cuz its not where I've been, but where I am I love pancakes!!! |
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© Copyright 2008 Christine Juarez - All Rights Reserved | |||
wolf girl Member
since 2007-12-03
Posts 150washington, US |
amazing poem. |
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KandyGrl511 Member
since 2008-11-30
Posts 52Michigan |
hey thats not horrible at all i liked the poem |
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Falling rain
since 2008-01-31
Posts 2178Small town, Illinois |
I like it.. Don't be too hard on yourself honey. Your a great writer you just need to believe in yourself every-now and then -Zach So together but so broken inside |
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