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Teen Poetry #8

I Left You This Note

Clockwork_Orange
Senior Member

since 2007-03-23

Posts 620
Space Camp, IN

0 posted 2008-10-04 12:43 PM

hey you, you make me smile
even when the worst days seem like hell
i cant understand what is is about you
walking on water as my words seep through

and i dont know what you see in me
but you make me laugh every time we meet
and even if i could buy you the world
you deserve so much more

here i am and dont know what to say
if i pour out my heart then im praying for rain
im going under and im trying to stay afloat
i cant seem to say hello so i left you this note

Falling rain

Member Elite

since 2008-01-31

Posts 2178
Small town, Illinois

1 posted 2008-10-04 02:49 PM

"here I am and don't know what to say
if I pour out my heart then I'm praying for rain
I'm going under and I'm trying to stay afloat
I cant seem to say hello so I left you this note"

So much emotion poured into that stanza.. Great work Bryan..

-Zach

"I'd rather be anything but ordinary!!"

RevengeIsMine
Senior Member

since 2006-07-08

Posts 820
Australia

2 posted 2008-10-04 09:15 PM

WOW.. So powerful. Such pure talent. Great Work!

hunnie_girl

Member Elite

since 2006-06-18

Posts 2567
Canada

3 posted 2008-10-05 12:07 PM

i <3 this Bryan... great talent..
Krysti

Just.Another.Falling.Star
Member

since 2008-05-08

Posts 422
Canada

4 posted 2008-10-05 08:35 PM

this was spectacular. there's so many better words for it, but i can't find them at the moment. so im just gonn stop talking and end it with this...great job once again!!! library.

~*Julianna*~

"Somewhere under the rainbow...there will be thunderstorms."

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