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Teen Poetry #8
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Just.Another.Falling.Star
Member
since 2008-05-08
Posts 422
Canada

0 posted 2008-07-07 06:29 PM


The Flicker Of A Candle

The slow flicker of a candle,
Is what lights up this darkened room.
Our shadows dance in a rhythm.
That’s beauty is undeniable.
As we talk the night away,
Each answer to each question...
Opens up our hearts to one another.
You keep complimenting me,
About what you like best about me
From the light of the candle,
You can see my face flush,
With every word you flatter me by.
So as this romantic flicker of the candle,
Slowly burns farter—and then gone...
I feel out foreheads touch,
And our lips meet,
I feel the pulsing of your heart in your neck
And I keep my finger there.
For that is what holds us here,
Your beat and mine,
After the flicker of he candle,
Was long gone from this room.

~*Julianna*~

"This lullaby is only a few words
A simple run of chords
Quiet here in this spare room
But you can hear it, hear it
Wherever you m

© Copyright 2008 Julianna - All Rights Reserved
Assassin_of_Verse
Member
since 2007-10-23
Posts 330
that So Cal
1 posted 2008-07-10 02:04 AM


I really liked this piece. It conveys its message very honestly. It's seems simple at first, but the ending made me think. I'm surprised that no one else commented.

There is power in the pen.

Just.Another.Falling.Star
Member
since 2008-05-08
Posts 422
Canada
2 posted 2008-07-10 10:18 AM


Thanks, Assassin_of_Verse. This poem seemed to just flow off my pen and onto the paper, I didn't even realize how it was until it was finished.

~*Julianna*~

"This lullaby is only a few words
A simple run of chords
Quiet here in this spare room
But only you can hear it, hear it..."
-Sara

Assassin_of_Verse
Member
since 2007-10-23
Posts 330
that So Cal
3 posted 2008-07-10 06:23 PM


No problem. But please, call me Andrew. Or AoV for short.

There is power in the pen.

Falling rain
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Member Elite
since 2008-01-31
Posts 2178
Small town, Illinois
4 posted 2008-07-10 08:01 PM


Ahh!! Julianna!! this poem is awesome!!!! love it! (library) lol..
srry.. little hyper here.. Hahaha!!

~Zach~

"And so the lion fell in love with the lamb....,"he murmured. "What a stupid lamb," I sighed. "What a sick, masochistic lion."

eternally_singing
Member
since 2007-12-18
Posts 123
PA, United States
5 posted 2008-07-10 11:49 PM


Spectacular poem- i loved it!
Just.Another.Falling.Star
Member
since 2008-05-08
Posts 422
Canada
6 posted 2008-07-11 10:54 AM


Thank you everyone. Oh, and sorry if the phone call the other day was too much of a  surprise Zach, we were hyper, and had a bit too much to drink (jones drinks, not alchohal), lol.

~*Julianna*~

"This lullaby is only a few words
A simple run of chords
Quiet here in this spare room
But only you can hear it, hear it..."
-Sara

Falling rain
Deputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 Tour
Member Elite
since 2008-01-31
Posts 2178
Small town, Illinois
7 posted 2008-07-12 12:25 PM


Oh it was fine.. I didn't mind.... caught me off gaurd but that's okay with me...   

Great poem by the way..

lol

~Zach~

"And so the lion fell in love with the lamb....,"he murmured. "What a stupid lamb," I sighed. "What a sick, masochistic lion."

Clockwork_Orange
Senior Member
since 2007-03-23
Posts 620
Space Camp, IN
8 posted 2008-07-12 12:29 PM


this was an awesome poem. i loved your words. great write.
Just.Another.Falling.Star
Member
since 2008-05-08
Posts 422
Canada
9 posted 2008-07-13 01:52 PM


Thanks to all. I certainly loved writing this poem, it came out so easily. Keep watching for more!!

~*Julianna*~

"This lullaby is only a few words
A simple run of chords
Quiet here in this spare room
But only you can hear it, hear it..."
-Sara

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