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Teen Poetry #8

let your heart out

forever*wishing
Member

since 2006-05-29

Posts 178
where my heart is

0 posted 2006-10-24 06:25 PM

everyone knows
but nobody shows
what's deep inside
and deep in mind
but skin deep thoughts
aren't worth alot
because nothing is
unless its expressed.

wishing it was said
wont post it ahead
you must be strong
to show what you long
to get out in the open
and let the truth win
so that everyone sees
what your heart reads.

when your last chance
is your proof of existance
tell them who you are
and it WILL get you far
maybe even one more chance
if you take the time to dance
this is what everyone knows
but only FEW of them chose.

so take a deep breath
and start your quest
yes you COULD fall
but you must risk it all
for you stumble now and then
but you will make it in the end
if you just let out a shout
if you let your heart out.

~me

rhia_5779
Senior Member

since 2006-06-09

Posts 1334
California

1 posted 2006-10-25 09:57 AM

Really liked this stanza

so take a deep breath
and start your quest
yes you COULD fall
but you must risk it all
for you stumble now and then
but you will make it in the end
if you just let out a shout
if you let your heart out.

But this had so much forced rhminh in it. THe rhythmn is really off also,

rhia_5779
Senior Member

since 2006-06-09

Posts 1334
California

2 posted 2006-10-25 09:57 AM

*Forced rhyme

forever*wishing
Member

since 2006-05-29

Posts 178
where my heart is

3 posted 2006-10-25 10:21 AM

this was just a crazy w/ever poem...i didn't really try to make it sound good...it was just for the fun of it...but thanx...i thought so too...

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