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Teen Poetry #8

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WaterFairy103
Member

since 2006-05-31

Posts 196

0 posted 2006-10-22 03:23 PM

When you saw us together, you saw red.
And when I left you for him, to you I was dead.
You swore that hell would be the next place we'd meet,
I lied and said "That's all right with me!"
And you didn't know it, but I cried that night,
I hated that I'd lost you with one stupid fight.

Now we kept our words, and stayed away,
Even though it was killing us both day by day.
And when our pride broke, and we finally gave in,
I was so happy to see you again.
We stayed up that night and talked for hours,
about everything from dogs to cats to flowers.

You've always been there when I needed you,
When I've broken a bone, or worse, a shoe.
I can't fathom what would be if you weren't here,
To call me penguin and tug on my ears.
And I know sometimes I make you mad,
But I want you to know that I love you, Dad.

rhia_5779
Senior Member

since 2006-06-09

Posts 1334
California

1 posted 2006-10-22 04:37 PM

Nice twist at the end

Renegade
Junior Member

since 2006-10-21

Posts 22

2 posted 2006-10-22 08:34 PM

agreed rhia i didn't see the end part coming and at the end it flowed and rhymed perfectly

im so jealous i can't write like that

hunnie_girl

Member Elite

since 2006-06-18

Posts 2567
Canada

3 posted 2006-10-24 12:14 PM

this was amazing yes, well agreed i did not expect the ending, though it was very nice emotional yet had a very nice flow, hope to read more soon...
hunnie*

A time to love, and a time to hate; a time of war and a time for peace ~Ecclesiastes 3:8~

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