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Teen Poetry #8
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maybe tomorrow
| Teen Poetry #8 |
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maybe tomorrow |
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Renegade Junior Member
since 2006-10-21
Posts 22 |
I see your eyes And yours see mine And as time flies Your quite benign My tongue is tied My hand shaking my smiles wide my heart aching you are who? i do not know i have no clue I wish i'd know I run away afraid to talk what to say? still in shock maybe tomorrow its another day again, although... lay in dismay 'til th' next day I will just sigh I will just say i will say hi The next day I see your eyes and I reply to your hi's It's going fine I'll see you soon At what time? During noon |
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| © Copyright 2006 Renegade - All Rights Reserved | |||
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RevengeIsMine Senior Member
since 2006-07-08
Posts 820Australia |
Great Poem... Well done... |
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rhia_5779 Senior Member
since 2006-06-09
Posts 1334California |
Catchy,nice flow |
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patience_iago Member
since 2006-08-30
Posts 54 |
My tongue is tied My hand shaking my smiles wide my heart aching I LOVE that line. "There are some days where i believe i might die of an overdose of satisfaction" |
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stargal Senior Member
since 2006-03-06
Posts 1352OR USA |
"you are who? i do not know i have no clue I wish i'd know" This part of the poem was one of my favorites! Although I would be hard pressed to pick a favorite, favorite. I found the whole poem to be a pleasurable read. I must agree with rhia that the flow is very "catchy" and I liked how you were able to capture that feel. It, for me, adds a lot to a poem. Thanks for sharing! I hope to read more of your work in the near future  "I will love the light for it shows me the way, yet I will endure the darkness for it shows me the stars." - Og Mandino @-->--- |
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forever*wishing Member
since 2006-05-29
Posts 178where my heart is |
nice = ) |
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