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Teen Poetry #8

What she's doing

hunnie_girl

Member Elite

since 2006-06-18

Posts 2567
Canada

0 posted 2008-04-13 05:49 PM

I wonder if you notice
just what she's tryin to do
maybe its just me that thinks
she wants to get her hands on you

I dont really think she loves you
and I dont think you can see
all that she is doing
is takin you away from me

I wonder where you are right now
while I am all alone
if only you could see me
sleeping by the telephone

you told me you were sleeping
at her house again tonight
does anyone else agree
that, that doesnt seem right?

I guess she must be jealous
of what you and I share
she wishes she could have someone
that showed her that they care

i dont blame you for what she's doin'
i only wished you'd see
the only reason she wants you
is cos' she knows that you want me!

~fool me once shame on you, fool me twice shame on me~

XxForever.BrokenxX
Senior Member

since 2008-01-20

Posts 891
Neverland

1 posted 2008-04-13 05:51 PM

awe, I like the way u ended it

{~~*~~}

{&}Love*liesOfBeauty~[NowColdInMyHand]
{`~Emily~`}

Jaki H
Member

since 2008-01-19

Posts 232
NJ, USA

2 posted 2008-04-13 07:56 PM

oh my gosh thats really good! honestly, cant find anything wrong with it!

wonderful ending too! and creative idea. never would have thought of it myself!

hiddensmiles
Senior Member

since 2008-02-07

Posts 514
at the beach... i wish

3 posted 2008-04-13 08:12 PM

Great write!!!! this is a library for sure! i have felt this way before to many times.

wisdomofthesword
Member

since 2007-12-17

Posts 224
the last place on earth

4 posted 2008-04-13 11:31 PM

really great write

I don't care if you think I'm a fool but don't ever tell me so

imsimplyme
Junior Member

since 2008-04-01

Posts 16
California

5 posted 2008-04-14 08:54 PM

Wow that was really good

Belinda
Member

since 2006-01-30

Posts 126
UK

6 posted 2008-04-21 06:15 PM

well once again, you fail to dissappoint me.
all your material is so good, hunnie you are very very talented.
it's writes like these which remind me why i joined

take care.

Belinda~*

Expect nothing, Prepare for anything.

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