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Teen Poetry #8
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What is me?
| Teen Poetry #8 |
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What is me? |
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rhia_5779 Senior Member
since 2006-06-09
Posts 1334California |
As I sit by the window staring as my life passes me by, watching it all fall to pieces, disappearing shreds of my life. Falling fast tatters and bits, dripping drops into shadow. My view is clouded, puzzle doesn’t fit, Erratic size changes, how do I cope? Looking out the glass, and forgotten the view, navigating the maze, can’t find my way. Confused, lost any inkling of what to do. Each alleyway seems so right, Illusions begin to erode my sight, unevenly balanced in what’s dream and real. Real seems so fake, dreams seem too right. Colors spots inside my head, and overload, senses close down, hard to see. Hearing mute sounds, defected, all surreal fingers numb, can’t hardly feel. Memories fading, hard to remember. What is me? |
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| © Copyright 2006 rhia_5779 - All Rights Reserved | |||
hunnie_girl
since 2006-06-18
Posts 2567Canada |
was definatly not one of my favorites from you. senses close down, hard to see. Hearing mute sounds, defected, all surreal fingers numb, can’t hardly feel. Memories fading, hard to remember. What is me? the ending took me right back into the depth of the poem... hunnie*  A time to love, and a time to hate; a time of war and a time for peace ~Ecclesiastes 3:8~ |
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tapper798 Member
since 2003-07-20
Posts 353My own world |
I absolutly loved the first stanza. Very powerful. After that though, I felt like the rest weren't as powerful, so you have something to draw you in, but the rest wasn't as good. Keep it up though, I love how you write. AIM-beatufu1tragidy |
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