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Ri
Member

since 2008-02-01

Posts 67
Blackburn, England

0 posted 2008-02-01 07:10 PM

Words like velvet, face like thunder
The truth lies behind your eyes
As my hope begins to plunder
See my sighs as silent cries
Before my heart plummets under.

In a sea that offers no disguise
When you frown at me I drown
Under the storm of burning eyes
Pushing down, you take my crown
I see behind your waves of lies

Like post eclipse sun, I find light
I’m hard pressed to know detest
So heated that it takes my sight
Not at best, my eyes need rest
Blinding me, the truth is too bright

Where do I head? I find I’m lost
Feeling fazed my skies are hazed
My stubbornness could come at cost
Stakes are raised; I’m never praised
I want your warmth but get your frost

XxForever.BrokenxX
Senior Member

since 2008-01-20

Posts 891
Neverland

1 posted 2008-02-01 07:24 PM

hmmm...so true. The last line really sticks out to me. You abviously are an experienced poet. Fantastic first post. I hope to see more from you, I found that truley amazing. And welcome to Passions.

FoReVeR.BrOkEn

hunnie_girl

Member Elite

since 2006-06-18

Posts 2567
Canada

2 posted 2008-02-02 03:48 PM

Rian, amazing poem And WELCOME TO PASSIONS!!!

hope to read more soon

Krysti

Falling rain

Member Elite

since 2008-01-31

Posts 2178
Small town, Illinois

3 posted 2008-02-02 06:12 PM

Amazing poem. Your really good at writing poetry. I cant wait to see more of your work. And welcome to Passions! =)

RenaissanceRomanceRunsRed
Senior Member

since 2007-06-11

Posts 1062
In Love <3

4 posted 2008-02-02 06:32 PM

hey rian welcome- incredible first post, i'll be looking for more.

-Kate

and in the daylight i miss the nightmare- but deathly fear it in the dark of night

Earl Robertson
Senior Member

since 2008-01-21

Posts 753
BC, Canada

5 posted 2008-02-02 09:32 PM

Ri you amaze me! This is such a great poem. It has great meaning to me especialy I think. (excluding yourself of course.)
Exelent first post: you're in my library for sure!

"Be Strong and Always Remember what made you you." Earl

"Ooo!!! Ooo!! I know! I know! um...he he" Earl
(Yes I am crazy)

Ri
Member

since 2008-02-01

Posts 67
Blackburn, England

6 posted 2008-02-03 01:52 PM

Thanks for the feedback, you've been instantly welcoming

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