Teen Poetry #8 |
So I Can Answer Yes |
Earl Robertson Senior Member
since 2008-01-21
Posts 753BC, Canada |
So I Can Answer Yes! Ask me if I want you and I will answer no For the promise flares Within my mind I made so long ago That I would not afflict my mind with ooh’s and aah’s and stares So now I cannot love you Beyond what’s given now Know my understanding and feel my words as true I promise I will love as soon as love allows For I have made my pledge To keep my heart of flesh not stone Around my mind I’ve placed a hedge My passions held no longer blown The love I need is love indeed In my eyes as in yours light has come to me Now each day I fight my passion in a seed As I feel a love and light as a mighty tree Ask me if I love you and I will answer yes! The light within I’ve seen so fine To grow, to brighten and to flourish In your eye’s I have seen the brightening of mine Please ask me if I love you… so I can answer yes! "Be Strong and Always Remember what made you you." Earl |
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© Copyright 2008 Frank Robertson - All Rights Reserved | |||
XxForever.BrokenxX Senior Member
since 2008-01-20
Posts 891Neverland |
wow. I found that very literal. The third stanza really stuck out too. I can almost understand every single feeling you may have felt while writing this, which I believe is pretty much impossible. To relate to everything in the same way as the poet him/herself. Thank you for that, it also made me think. FoReVeR.BrOkEn |
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RenaissanceRomanceRunsRed Senior Member
since 2007-06-11
Posts 1062In Love <3 |
awww, i was so sad when i frist started reading this, i thought i was going to have to go read some more happy poem, but it had such a sweet ending, you kinda lost me in your transition for not loveing to loveing, but that may just be my tired brain. lol. *sarcastically in a teasing sorta way* (i didn't hurt your feelings did i?) lol. -Kate and in the daylight i miss the nightmare- but deathly fear it in the dark of night |
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Falling rain
since 2008-01-31
Posts 2178Small town, Illinois |
Very nice. Your words captured my attention and kept it intill the poem was done. and i know how you feel when u were writing this. but over-all very good |
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hunnie_girl
since 2006-06-18
Posts 2567Canada |
ahh Frank I love your critiques message it makes me laff everytime i see it:P:P I absolutly looove this poem great write Krysti |
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Earl Robertson Senior Member
since 2008-01-21
Posts 753BC, Canada |
Man, thank you guys! Glad you enjoyed it! (mumbles to self) I'm not realy that good at getting emotion across am I? Oh well. Kate: The difference is lust and love. I have made a promise to myself not to lust after anyone because I know what it does to me. However I still feel a purer love towards somone and am struggling to keep it no more than that. Why? Because "The love I need is love indeed" I already have somthing better so "I will love you as soon as love allows". Hope that helps. -Frank "Be Strong and Always Remember what made you you." Earl "Ooo!!! Ooo!! I know! I know! um...he he" Earl (Yes I am crazy) |
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