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navwin » Archives » Teen Poetry #8 » whats happening?
Teen Poetry #8
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wolf girl
Member
since 2007-12-03
Posts 150
washington, US
0 posted 2008-01-06 11:13 PM

i know i havent written in a while. ive been going through some hard times. i hope you like it.
questions questions
they run through my head
nothing makes sense

have i been condemed?
everytime i try to be happy
something happens and it goes all unhappy

everytime i strive for exellence
things come crashing down

people say ill find someone for me
these things happening i cant see

will someone ever treat me right?
will they all break me?

i thought you were the one
but things came undone

questions question
they run ravid in my head
© Copyright 2008 Jenna - All Rights Reserved
pen&paper
Senior Member
since 2006-06-06
Posts 513
1 posted 2008-01-07 10:05 AM

I really liked this, the last two lines were especially my favorite. in the 6th line though try using a different word in place of unhappy. I liked this a lot. Cant wait to see more from you!
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navwin » Archives » Teen Poetry #8 » whats happening?

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