Teen Poetry #8 |
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How do I give up? |
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rhia_5779 Senior Member
since 2006-06-09
Posts 1334California |
I'm hurting and I don’t know how to make it stop. I don’t know what went wrong I followed all directions. Where did I get lost? Where has my purpose gone? I’m so confused about what I should know. Not even sure that I have a right to be hurtin’ Compared to others, I’m not even low. It’s my game, but I’ve forgotten how to win. Emotions are really tearing me to pieces But I am sick and tired of know understanding , Of not knowing what any of this means. I took off for flight and fell on the landing. I hurt so badly and I don’t know why It leaves me drained and empty of feeling I can’t tell the truth from all of my lies. I don’t know how to give up, without kneeling. I want to let myself out, maybe get a clue. But the sooner I get close, it just hurts my heart. I’m scared what I fear is gonna come true. Destroyed inside, I want to heal at least in part |
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© Copyright 2007 rhia_5779 - All Rights Reserved | |||
hunnie_girl![]() ![]()
since 2006-06-18
Posts 2567Canada |
Rhia, this had so much emotion in it. One of my fav. from you. Krysti ~fool me once shame on you, fool me twice shame on me~ |
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jayjara Member
since 2007-05-02
Posts 90Florida |
Nice...the 1st 2 stanzas didn't really capture me..but I'm glad I read the rest of the poem because the last stanzas were original and raw with emotion. Maybe the 1st 2 stanzas you can elaborate with sum concrete detail on the directions and the confusion and scratch the questions you ask (personally i think it throws the flow off) kool -J |
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BrittanyJ Member
since 2007-06-03
Posts 461Come find me? |
"I want to let myself out, maybe get a clue. But the sooner I get close, it just hurts my heart. I’m scared what I fear is gonna come true. Destroyed inside, I want to heal at least in part" This is beautiful!! The emotion ran so deep, and the flow was wonderful as well. All around an amazing write ![]() So no more hiding all your pain, you deserve a new start. That's why i'm closing myself away, this is a message from your heart. |
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Leanne <3 Member
since 2007-08-25
Posts 216N.S.W, Australia |
this expresses so much emotion. i really loved reading it! ![]() ![]() |
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