What I should have said(Part 1)

How to Join	Member's Area	Private Library	Search	Sanctuary		Login
Main Forums	Discussion	Tech Talk	Mature Content	Archives	A home without a wall, Our haven without ends, A circle we all call Our Family of Friends!

hunnie_girl

Member Elite

since 2006-06-18

Posts 2567
Canada

0 posted 2007-07-31 01:12 AM

What I should have said(Part 1)

you looked so sad standing outside my door,
everythings changed it's not the same anymore,
staring out my window counting passing cars,
what a surprise ending to a love like ours,

looking down the road as your headlights disappear,
I touch my face and gently wipe away a tear,
I could have slowed you down told you my side,
but nothing i'd have said would change that I lied,

I wish i'd have said I need you,
and I don't know what to do,
but I just watched you walk away,
I wish I'd have said please stay,
now I'm sitting awake in bed,
replaying what I should have said

~fool me once shame on you, fool me twice shame on me~

[This message has been edited by hunnie_girl (08-02-2007 01:18 PM).]

forever*wishing
Member

since 2006-05-29

Posts 178
where my heart is

1 posted 2007-07-31 03:23 AM

i really kinda liked this one of yours, it seemed to flow very well...the last section was kinda hard to read, but it makes sense.
overall i really liked it = ) n-A-ice

BrittanyJ
Member

since 2007-06-03

Posts 461
Come find me?

2 posted 2007-07-31 11:42 AM

"now I'm sitting awake in bed,
replaying what I should have said"

I loved this hunnie!! It was so touching

I can't tell you how many times i have felt this way.

So no more hiding all your pain, you deserve a new start. That's why i'm closing myself away, this is a message from your heart.

buttercupbaby
Member

since 2006-05-03

Posts 400
outside in the rain

3 posted 2007-08-01 11:52 AM

what kind of confuses me is that in the first stanza, you said
"you look so sad standing outside my door,
everythings changed it's not the same anymore,
staring out my window counting passing cars,
what a surprise ending to a love like ours,

then you said

looking down the road as your headlights disappear,
I touch my face and gently wipe away a tear,
I could have slowed you down told you my side,
but nothing i'd have said would change that I lied,

So obviously you don't get what confuses me from that, ha ha, but what i mean is, you say "you look so sad standing outside my door" then you say "looking down the road as your headlights disapear" so it seems odd that he'd be outside the door then driving down the road. It makes me sense to me if you had said "you looked so sad standing outside my door"...

but thats jus me.. an im sick, so i'm being very picky because i'm bored. sorry

but i really liked this, we all think about things we know we should've said, but the chance is gone, an it sticks wi us forever.
I like it :]

~missy
afraid of my feelings and falling too deep, but i had to let go of the pain let it rain down on me

hunnie_girl

Member Elite

since 2006-06-18

Posts 2567
Canada

4 posted 2007-08-02 01:20 PM

thank yu all for your replies. Missy- I understand what you are saying I changed that thank you

hunnie.

~fool me once shame on you, fool me twice shame on me~

RenaissanceRomanceRunsRed
Senior Member

since 2007-06-11

Posts 1062
In Love <3

5 posted 2007-08-06 11:22 AM

now I'm sitting awake in bed,
replaying what I should have said

oh how many times i've done just that
so relateable. i loved it it's going in my library.

-Red

"I thought I'd just mention in passing . . . I always wanted a Sparkly of my very own." -Jeremy The Crow

Leanne <3
Member

since 2007-08-25

Posts 216
N.S.W, Australia

6 posted 2007-08-25 05:38 AM

it's like you've got inside my head
ive had these feelings too many timess
i love it! keep it up

	⇧ top of page ⇧
All times are ET (US). All dates are in Year-Month-Day format.