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Teen Poetry #8

Life Without You

surf_painter
Member

since 2007-04-10

Posts 434
Canada

0 posted 2007-07-18 10:59 PM

Your laugh was all I needed
The soft touch of your hand
Gates open now
Tears flow as rivers
Happiness is replaced with guilt
Guilt of life
For your not there
To keep me from my fears
To have them disappear
For your hand to be in mine
Is to much a rush
With the guilt of time
Taken to soon
From our warm condo
I looked to the moon
As you once taught me
I try to disspell
This feeling
But it's too late
Because my happiness is replaced
Replaced with the guilt of life
Having seen you go so soon
Before your time was up

BrittanyJ
Member

since 2007-06-03

Posts 461
Come find me?

1 posted 2007-07-19 10:39 AM

"Because my happiness is replaced
Replaced with the guilt of life
Having seen you go so soon
Before your time was up"

That's a really awful feeling, having to see someone die young. I was kinda thrown off by the rythm...but it was a wonderful choice of words

So no more hiding all your pain, you deserve a new start. That's why i'm closing myself away, this is a message from your heart.

Rainbowrose
Junior Member

since 2007-08-11

Posts 11

2 posted 2007-08-11 10:33 PM

times of gilt , this is the best part becuse i cant get it out of my head so in outher words i love it!

littlefairy
Member

since 2007-08-06

Posts 51
New York

3 posted 2007-08-12 01:26 PM

Guilts a hard thing to deal with. Try not to feel guilty because it ruins everything. I'm sorry you had to lose the person who mattered that much to you. Good poem. -Tara

I’m good during the day. But at night I wait.I wait for the one who’ll never return.

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