Open Poetry #44 |
Whoa, Cowboy! |
Earth Angel Member Empyrean
since 2002-08-27
Posts 40215Realms of Light |
Artist:Lily Carson Whoa, Cowboy! by Linda L. Dowd Whoa, cowboy! ~ Where ya goin’? ~ Ya still got business here! Cain’t ya finish what ya started? ~ Stop cryin’ in yer beer! I’m mighty big ‘n brassy, ~ Any man would think me a prize. Though me teeth be broke or missin’, ~ I’m a feast fer hongry eyes! Now, I may not have much schoolin’, But I did read “Dick and Jane”. Cain’t say I understood it, And readin’ it was a pain! Me manners are quite poorly, ~ Some say that I’m uncouth. Although I pass ~ a lot of gas, ~ I ferever speaks da truth. Me pappy ~ he’s in jail, And me momma ~ she's insane. I takes a bath just once a year, ~ In a horse trough filled with rain. Don’t drag yer tail behind ya, Like a whimperin’ little dog. Lovin’ comes quite natural. ~ It’s like falling off a log! Come yippee-kye-yeah in the saddle. ~ Ya knows dem birds ‘n bees. If ya rides dem buckin’ broncos, ~ Ya kin rides a mare like me! ~ |
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© Copyright 2009 Linda L. Dowd - All Rights Reserved | |||
1slick_lady Member Ascendant
since 2000-12-22
Posts 6088standing on a shadow's lace |
too funny |
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Dee Member Elite
since 2000-08-19
Posts 2330Queensland, Australia |
I love stories about cowboys and this one tops 'em all. Stand straight and tall, not the reflection as others see you, but as you truely are. Clearwater |
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ethome Member Patricius
since 2000-05-14
Posts 11858New Brunswick Canada |
He he sounds like a looooverly woman! I got a good chuckle out of this one Angel......Thanks Eric |
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Alison
since 2008-01-27
Posts 9318Lumpy oatmeal makes me crazy! |
Hey Linder, You done did good agin. You shore can write them poems. I am lovin' this one, little angel girly. Love, Ali-Oop |
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Marchmadness Member Rara Avis
since 2007-09-16
Posts 9271So. El Monte, California |
Hilarious, Linda. You have a lovely sense of humor. Ida |
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Richy Member Elite
since 2003-05-03
Posts 3050 |
Whoa cowgirl, now lemme see, broke teeth, takes a bath once a year whether she needs it or not, oh, and gassy… stand back fellers, she’s mine!!! Pardon me Mam, well I reckon I am taking a liking to yers, but I’m not sure I could fall off any logs with ya right yet, its been awhile since I been back in the saddle, hmmm, you wouldn’t happen to have a saddle with a seat belt on it now would ya? Ahh heck, I’m gonna need a full roll cage. Heeyaww! Ride em cowgirl! |
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viking_metal Senior Member
since 2007-02-02
Posts 1337In a Jeep, Minnesota. |
She sounds smelly :O Great write, darling Earth Angel. Some people fall in love and touch the sky, some people fall in love and find quicksand. |
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steavenr Member Elite
since 2003-11-17
Posts 4058 |
smiles...chuckles...and hearty laughter...and, probably a good thing that I was alone when I read this one...yer a funny one |
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Bill Charles Member Patricius
since 2000-07-11
Posts 10619highways, & byways, for now |
Linda - just and amazing write... BC |
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Balladeer
Administrator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-06-05
Posts 25505Ft. Lauderdale, Fl USA |
Hey, cowgirl! Here's a lesson From this ole cowpoke here Yur takin' chances messin' With the wrangler Balladeer! I'll hogtie you in no time flat And then I'll tell you what. I'm gonna place my special brand right squarely on yor butt! From that point on, you're mine alone. My brand will make it clear That no one messes with no gal That's marked by Balladeer. I;ll tan yor hide when you are bad Then tie you to a tree And make you feel a lotta sad For disobeyin' me. Some dirt-poor farmer's what you need Or some poor milktoast nerd. Yah gotta be a special breed To be part of MY herd! But if you're feeling brave enough And say you ain't no ninny Don't need to show me that you're tough All ya gotta do is...whinny. |
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nourzihane Member
since 2008-07-10
Posts 254Algeria |
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Earth Angel Member Empyrean
since 2002-08-27
Posts 40215Realms of Light |
Helen ~ A slick un likes youse, kin appreciates me flustrations! Me likes a hongry man ~ not no ornery un! Sheesh! Happy NYs 2 U, Lindylou [This message has been edited by Earth Angel (01-03-2009 11:04 AM).] |
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Earth Angel Member Empyrean
since 2002-08-27
Posts 40215Realms of Light |
Dee ~ Well, I reckon I kin see hows ya might see the hoomah in diss sorry situation, but it ain't no laughin' matter! Happy NYs 2 U, Lindylou |
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Earth Angel Member Empyrean
since 2002-08-27
Posts 40215Realms of Light |
Ethome ~ Hey, big boy ~ I heres dey grows 'em big up d' ere in the Great White North! ~ Me likes that! Saddle up! Eeee awwww! Big Bertha's headin' north! Happy NYs 2 U, Lindylou |
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Earth Angel Member Empyrean
since 2002-08-27
Posts 40215Realms of Light |
Ali-Oop ~ Hey, gal, wanna comes ta Kanada with yores trooly? I here dat they grow d'ere mens big ~ and on trees! Happy NYs 2 U, Lindylou |
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Earth Angel Member Empyrean
since 2002-08-27
Posts 40215Realms of Light |
Marches Mad Hatter ~ Hows me little Ida Belle doin'?!? Me luvs yer cents of hoomah two! Yer a live 'un! Happy NYs 2 U, Lindylou |
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Earth Angel Member Empyrean
since 2002-08-27
Posts 40215Realms of Light |
Richy ~ Yer rich! Hardy har har! Yeppers, one saddle with a seat belt and a roll-her over cage comin' up! Dis ride ain't fer no sissies en ya needs all da protection ya kin git! Happy NYs 2 U, Lindylou |
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Earth Angel Member Empyrean
since 2002-08-27
Posts 40215Realms of Light |
viking-metal ~ Me smelly, ya sez!?! I'm as sweet as a possum in a tree! Now dat cowboy, he downright stinks! ~ but me nose knows luv when it smells it! Happy NYs 2 U, Lindylou |
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Earth Angel Member Empyrean
since 2002-08-27
Posts 40215Realms of Light |
steaven ~ Me likes a man wit a good sense of hoomah! Where d'ya live? Never minds, my man radar will track ya down! Big Bertha always gits her man ~ eventually! Hardy har har! Happy NYs 2 U, Lindylou |
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Toerag Member Ascendant
since 1999-07-29
Posts 5622Ala bam a |
Fergit about that Balladeer You know you really should Come take a ride with Toerag My nickname's Clint Eastwood! |
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Earth Angel Member Empyrean
since 2002-08-27
Posts 40215Realms of Light |
BC ~ Billy Boy! It's been awhiles since ya rodes inta town! Belly up to the bar boy and lets remmaniss 'bout dem good ole days. Me gots sum mighty fine moonshine I mades all by meself in da woods behine da swine pen! Happy NYs 2 U, Lindylou |
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Earth Angel Member Empyrean
since 2002-08-27
Posts 40215Realms of Light |
Ball-a-deer!!! Me thoughts ya was stills in jail!!! Me butt is awaitin' The brand of Balladeer! And I'll be proudly showin' That kiss upon me rear! Ya kin ties me like a hog Ya kin ties me ta a tree Ya kin boss me like a bull But ya won't gits da best o me! (Would a whinny or two do?) Eeee Haaaw! Happy NYs 2 U Linderlou |
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Earth Angel Member Empyrean
since 2002-08-27
Posts 40215Realms of Light |
Nourzihane ~ Methinks dat yer not gonna bees able to understands me response as Inglish ain't yer mother's tongue! Butt thankee fer da artsy fartsy "Thank You"! Happy NYs 2 ya! Lindylou |
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Earth Angel Member Empyrean
since 2002-08-27
Posts 40215Realms of Light |
Toe Jam!!! Wells its abouts time ya showed back up!!! It ain't polite ta keeps a hongry lady waitin'! Let's saddle up, Clinty Baby! Yer lady awaits your Eastwood! Happy NYs ta ya, cowpoker! Lindylou |
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Balladeer
Administrator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-06-05
Posts 25505Ft. Lauderdale, Fl USA |
Yep, cowpoker describes Toerag pretty well |
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Earth Angel Member Empyrean
since 2002-08-27
Posts 40215Realms of Light |
Hey, there, Balls-o-deer! I knews ya'd ketch dat! Toe's kinda slow on da uptake ~ if ya ketch me drift! Say what 'bout youse 'n me pickin' up wheres weeze wuz at? Ize beginnin' ta tink youse da cream of da crap! ~ Beggin' yer pardon. Ize meants ta say "cream of da crop"! Kiss me grits, Wrangler! ~ 'n ya kin dispense with doze jeans! Heee Hawww Big Bertha nose how ta luvs ya! |
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Oklahoma Rose Senior Member
since 2008-02-28
Posts 1586Oklahoma USA |
Oh my! I'm speechless here, Linda. LOL! |
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Artic Wind Member Rara Avis
since 2007-09-16
Posts 8080Realm of Supernatural |
this is a funny one EA, I really enjoyed this! ARCTIC WIND |
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2islander2 Member Ascendant
since 2008-03-12
Posts 6825by the sea |
Hello Linda, enjoyed the poem a lot and made me think about cowboys in west taming horses...I like the metaphor and all lovely comments. yann |
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Earth Angel Member Empyrean
since 2002-08-27
Posts 40215Realms of Light |
Okie's finest rose ~ Ya sayin' yer speechless? Well, hot dang! Dats a first! lol Methinks ya need a good cowpoke in a coral, gal! May 2009 be a good un, fer ya! Hugs from Big Bertha a.k.a. BB |
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Earth Angel Member Empyrean
since 2002-08-27
Posts 40215Realms of Light |
ARCTIC WIND ~ Well, lookee here! Look who jest blew in from da north! It's bin awhile! Glad ya got a good laugh at me expense, boy! ~ Butt dats okie dokie as long as I stills gits me cowpokie! Happy NYs ta ya! BB |
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Earth Angel Member Empyrean
since 2002-08-27
Posts 40215Realms of Light |
Yann da Man! How are tings in French Land? Glad ya tooks a peekie boo at me little pome abouts me 'n me flustrations! You Frenchies seem ta nose alotta bouts lovin'. Care ta share?!? Happy New Years ta ya! Big Bertha |
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2islander2 Member Ascendant
since 2008-03-12
Posts 6825by the sea |
Dear Linda, things are what they are everywhere in the world and french have qualities and faults as everyone...The important to my eyes is deep loving... love all your comments yann |
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Earth Angel Member Empyrean
since 2002-08-27
Posts 40215Realms of Light |
Yann da Man! Me likes a man whose inta "deep loving"! Starin' inta me bloodshot eyes 'n makin' me sighs! Methinks I otta be headin' fer French Land! Hugs 'n glugs from BB |
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The Shadow in Blue Member
since 2006-05-18
Posts 493EL, Michigan |
Wow. This is quite the entertaining piece Linda. It made me smile. Thanks. Hope you all had a happy new year ~Jill |
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Alison
since 2008-01-27
Posts 9318Lumpy oatmeal makes me crazy! |
Linda, This entire thread is wonderful. I love it. A |
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JamesMichael Member Empyrean
since 1999-11-16
Posts 33336Kapolei, Hawaii, USA |
After coming off the range every cowboy needs a bath and a bed with a cowgirl in it...James |
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Ceinwyn Member Elite
since 2000-07-09
Posts 2175VA |
you sure do know how to make a gal smile not many people have that talent xoxo, Tink The only time we waste is the time we spend thinking we are alone. |
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Earth Angel Member Empyrean
since 2002-08-27
Posts 40215Realms of Light |
Da Shadow In Blue ~ Some ways back, me papa tooks me an me mama ta da big city ~ and I means BIG. Dose lights would blinds da sun! Yeppers! New Yoke City! I remembers da play dat me papa took us see to git us some culture. Da lyrics ta one of dem songs went somethin' like dis ~ "Lets me entertain yas. Lets me make ya smiles." Well ya done did me proud by sayin's I done likewisie! All da best ta yas in dis new years! Linderlu |
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Earth Angel Member Empyrean
since 2002-08-27
Posts 40215Realms of Light |
A Babes ~ Alison, Ise gots da "thread" if youse gots da needle! Youse 'n mes cuts from da same cloth! It's good ta git yer ribs tickled ever nows 'n dens. Glad ya stopped by 'n enjoyed yerself! Mays alls be fine in two thousands 'n nine! Linderlu |
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Earth Angel Member Empyrean
since 2002-08-27
Posts 40215Realms of Light |
James ~ Now youse is my kinda cowpoke! Is all youse guys on da islands like ya?! Ha-whyee ~ heres I come! Big Bertha's on her way! Dis is gonna be a very good year ferya! ~ Ta be shore! HeeHaw B.B. |
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Earth Angel Member Empyrean
since 2002-08-27
Posts 40215Realms of Light |
Tink ~ It tickles me pink dat Ise coulds put a smile on dat pritty face of yers! Yeppers, I'm glowin' like a rose in moonshine! Keep smilin', ya l'il darlin'! Dis is gonna be a year ta remember fer ya! Bells, boys, 'n bottles, B.B. |
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vandana
since 1999-10-22
Posts 10463USA |
enjoyed |
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suthern
since 1999-07-29
Posts 20723Louisiana |
ROFL... Bless you, angelic one... I needed these giggles! LOL |
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Earth Angel Member Empyrean
since 2002-08-27
Posts 40215Realms of Light |
vandana ~ A "nice" from you is always especially "nice". Thank you! |
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Earth Angel Member Empyrean
since 2002-08-27
Posts 40215Realms of Light |
Suthern One ~ I love to make you giggle ~ with that Texan accent of yours! I must admit that it was my alter ego Earth-y Angel that wrote this one! lol Love, Laughs, 'n hugs 'n smiles, Linda |
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JamesMichael Member Empyrean
since 1999-11-16
Posts 33336Kapolei, Hawaii, USA |
To the top again...this one has lots of life to it...James |
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Earth Angel Member Empyrean
since 2002-08-27
Posts 40215Realms of Light |
James da Ha-whyee Man! Well bless yer little pineapples! Ize wuz beginin' ta thinks I wuz gonna be all by my lonesome tanight! Ya jest put da gleam back in me moonshine eyes! Ya nose Big Bertha luvsya ~ lotz! Ize gots a little surprize fer ya!....Kin ya guess what it iz? ... Tsk, tsk, not THAT!!! I ain't no goat! ~ Ize iz a lady ya know! ~ 'n Ize got me principals. Ize gots sum moonshine fer ya ta gits yous in da mood for croonin' at da moon! See ya soon! B.B. |
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Honeybunch Member Rara Avis
since 2001-12-29
Posts 7115South Africa |
We never know what Earth Angel is going to offer us and what a surprise this was! Thank you, Linda, for this humorous little piece. Helen |
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Earth Angel Member Empyrean
since 2002-08-27
Posts 40215Realms of Light |
Bunches of Honey ~ Itz bin awhiles since ya dropped by! Watchya bin up ta? I betchya I nose! Ya bin rightin' pomes about looove 'n stuff. Reckon someone's gotta teach us proper 'bout dems buzzards 'n bees! Hope ya kin grabs a pip stool 'n stays awhile! Big bug hug, BB |
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Rick Mordecon Junior Member
since 2009-02-05
Posts 10NYC, N.Y. |
Earth angel this poem made me smile, and on a day like today, that's a great thing. thanks for your ascerbic, and intelligent humor. Rick |
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LindsayP Member Elite
since 2007-07-28
Posts 3410Australia, Victoria |
What a laugh and it doesn't leave much to the imagination. Written in your uaual competent style. Much enjoyed dear Linda. Love Lindsay |
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LindsayP Member Elite
since 2007-07-28
Posts 3410Australia, Victoria |
What a laugh and it doesn't leave much to the imagination. Written in your uaual competent style. Much enjoyed dear Linda. Love Lindsay |
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gilead Senior Member
since 2008-03-10
Posts 1067nevada, USA |
That thar is some o the bes' cowboy potree I done ever seed! This is busting me up Linda! art |
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gilead Senior Member
since 2008-03-10
Posts 1067nevada, USA |
That there is 'bout some o the bes' cowboy potree I's done evah seed! This is busting me up! Thanks Linda! art |
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turtle Senior Member
since 2009-01-23
Posts 548Harbor |
Peers ta me Balladeer is got emself one a dem si-te-a-tions. Kinda like dem dare deer, dat's blind in one eye? Hes got no eye deer what ees a gittun emself inta.. lol A fun read, I enjoyed the imagery. Great job Earth Angel! turtle |
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gilead Senior Member
since 2008-03-10
Posts 1067nevada, USA |
Oops! Got a lil' trigga happy wif m'post! art |
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Earth Angel Member Empyrean
since 2002-08-27
Posts 40215Realms of Light |
Rick ~ I aims ta please ya and makes ya smile! Sending some of me 'mountain dew' ta pick up yer spirits and keep da smile on dat kind face of yers! (I nose its a kind face 'cause ya wrote some mighty kind werds!) Big hug, BB |
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Earth Angel Member Empyrean
since 2002-08-27
Posts 40215Realms of Light |
LP ~ When you haha ~ me haha ~ den da hole Holler hahas! hahaha 'Scuse me nonsense! I's in a silly mood from all dat 'mountain dew'! Hugs 'n glugs from yer BB Girl! |
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Earth Angel Member Empyrean
since 2002-08-27
Posts 40215Realms of Light |
gilead ~ Tanks Art, ya old farrt! Comes up 'n sees me sum time! I's alwayz in da mood fer sum genteel companee! We's a might friendly in diss neck of da woods! Eee Aww! BB luvs ya! |
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Earth Angel Member Empyrean
since 2002-08-27
Posts 40215Realms of Light |
Slow One ~ Greetings, turtle! Ya may move as slow as blackstrap molasses in January, but yer wit is as sharp as a possum claw! Yeppers, Balls-o-deer is in deeper dan a pig in poop when it comes ta wrangling with yores trooly! Nice ta hears from ya! BB |
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Earth Angel Member Empyrean
since 2002-08-27
Posts 40215Realms of Light |
Dear Art da Farrt ~ Me likes a man whose "trigger happy"! I's a willin', waitin', 'n able! Yippee aye kye aye! BB |
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