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Open Poetry #44

Shattered Dreams

serquelia
Junior Member

since 2009-05-27

Posts 12
Pennsylvania

0 posted 2009-06-06 04:35 PM

All a broken mess
I must confess
what a dream can do,
but to distinguish
may be a little hard to do.

Being there in a dimension
is and can be such a great feeling unconscoiusly
not knowing what great depths
you can stride to.

Thoughts of the day
may lead to what can magically
goes on in your mind,
but to say they may dance
or even sprout roots
which they may work
in their own special way.

All and all these thoughts
all jumbled together
can create something that reveals itself.

Shattered and scattered
is just a matter
that the dreams are gone.

Remembered little
is just a part of the unconscoius mind.

Robert E. Jordan
Member Rara Avis

since 2008-01-25

Posts 8541
Philadelphia, Pennsylvania

1 posted 2009-06-06 05:09 PM

Yo Serquelia,

This comes across a little flat.

Read some of the other poetry posted here, and get some ideas.

Bobby

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